I also want to express our simpatico from CruiseMates staff for what has happened to you. As a man, I believe your husband will understand someday that you heart was in the right place and stop blaming you for events that were fully out of your control. He is grieving and he needs time to sort out his feelings.
Boy oh boy. What an ordeal for you to endure. The pressure of all the travel mishaps ALONE would have broken a lot of people down, but to add the tragedy of his sister on top of it all just makes you wonder what God has in mind for us sometimes.
As Eric Clapton said after his son died - the one thing he gained was acceptance of the knowledge that as humans we will never be able to fully understand the nature of God's will, but we just have to trust that he loves us and has reasons beyond our comprehension.