Thread: need a raise
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Old February 20th, 2008, 02:43 PM
earl earl is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: MONTREAL
Posts: 1,985
Default need a raise

>
> The Day the Penis asked for a Raise
>
> I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
> I do physical labor.
>
> I work at great depths.
>
> I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
>
> I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
>
> I work in a damp environment.
>
> I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
>
> I work in high temperatures.
>
> My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> P. Niss
>
> The Response:
>
> Dear P. Niss,
>
> After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you
>
> have raised,
>
> The administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
>
> You do not work 8 hours straight.
>
> You fall asleep after brief work periods.
>
> You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
>
> You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting
> other locations.
>
> You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and
> stimulated in order to start working.
>
> You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
>
> You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as
>
> wearing the correct protective clothing.
>
> You will retire well before you are 65.
>
> You are unable to work double shifts.
>
> You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
>
> completed your assigned task.
> And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and
> exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
>
>
> Sincerely,
>
> V. Gina
>
>
>

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