My partner and I love Holland America and I think your Olivia cruise might be on a HAL ship. We were considering that cruise but opted to take a straight HAL cruise to the W. Caribbean in April due to the cheaper cost of a straight cruise. They are very gay friendly even on their straight cruises. We went to Alaska last July.
Personally speaking, I wore my tuxedo and felt like a million bucks. My partner and I had our picture taken on formal night and I plan on wearing it again in April for formal nights. I got some gasps but I felt they were more like "wow, she looks good in that tux" instead of "oh my God, how could she." We have been together 18 years so I am at the point where, this is my wife and I don't really care what other people think. Please feel free to write if you wish.