We plan to take over New Zealand!!
There are dormant drugs in the Canadian Peameal bacon we ship to you.
And all the tuques we send over have microtransmitters implanted in them.
While watching the Santa Claus parade, the signal was transmitted by Santa's float, activating the chip in the tuque, and causing your body to release enzymes that interact with the drug in the bacon to make you guys like us.
(phase II begins with televised live Toronto Maple Leaf games)