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  #91 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 01:41 AM
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I am thankful that my kids are grown and I don't have to be subjected to the thoughts of what they might be doing anymore
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Old July 10th, 2007, 02:36 AM
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IMO, what we have here is a case of too much over nothing.

Please do not misconstrue my statement as either approving of the supposed activities or encouraging this type of behavior. However, we have very few facts to go on.

As one individual noted, certain young ladies look much older than their chronological age, while other young ladies look much younger. I recently hired a college junior who, when I introduced her to my CEO, her comment back to me was "when did we start hiring high schoolers?".

Who knows what is happening with this case? Who knows if this case is even true?
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  #93 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 03:19 AM
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One thing to remember-Attorneys are only right 50% of the time.
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Old July 10th, 2007, 06:40 AM
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...and incorrect the other half.
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Old July 10th, 2007, 08:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IBCRUZIN'
Carnival already has "uniformed" security officers on the ships. You usually don't see them until at night and they tend to hang out near the clubs and 24 hour pizza counter. They are not armed but they are indeed in security-looking grey uniforms. Very alert and stern faced.
Sometimes you just can't stop or control hormone-crazed young people. All you can do as a parent is pray and hope some of what you have drilled into their hard heads have stuck to one or two of their operating brain cells. If, after all the prayers and all the talks, they still don't listen, don't beat yourself up too much. One of the hardest job in the world is the job of parent to a teenager. Its tough.

And, sometimes, the best lessons learned are the hard ones you learn on your own.


Re Security: Hard to say if they have detered bad behaviour or just moved it to other locations, just as cities try to move the homeless from certain sections of the city. They probably deter problems in the areas they are but we still hear and see videos posted of kids being rude in passageways.

Since I am of an older generation I hold the belief that it it because we "talk" to our kids now rather than instilling the fact that there are consequences to their actions. A consequence is not taking away their cellphone or computer. A consequence is a spanking, or the experience of going to jail and having to be bailed out, even if it were only for a few hours. What ever happened to the movie "Scared Straight". This need not get into a discussion of whether corporal punishment is right or wrong.

Re: "And, sometimes, the best lessons learned are the hard ones you learn on your own....."

Sometimes when they learn this lesson it has already been at the expense of others.

If I may quote myself
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil&Liz
Whether we want it or not, there needs to be some sort of Code of Conduct document signed at embarkation that explains anyone observed
displaying unacceptable behavior will be subject to action by security personnel, up to and including involuntary disembark, confinement or monetary fines.
If I may borrow from the nice Mr. Mehawk when he wrote earlier this year....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mehawk
Think about this... these people are sober (well, they should be anyway) when they embark the ship. If they believe they can land overboard and be immune to any consequences, then they will take unbridled chances. HOWEVER, if they know, before they start drinking, that they could be found at fault and held responsible for ANY and ALL damages to the ship, employees and passengers, then they would think twice before getting that drunk.
I remember having to sign a waiver about Bird Flu before boarding. This was done as an action by CCL to advise passengers of their responsibilities, and I'm sure as some sort of release of responsibility on CCL's part.

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  #96 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 10:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil&Liz
Since I am of an older generation I hold the belief that it it because we "talk" to our kids now rather than instilling the fact that there are consequences to their actions. A consequence is not taking away their cellphone or computer. A consequence is a spanking, or the experience of going to jail and having to be bailed out, even if it were only for a few hours. What ever happened to the movie "Scared Straight". This need not get into a discussion of whether corporal punishment is right or wrong.

Re: "And, sometimes, the best lessons learned are the hard ones you learn on your own....."

Sometimes when they learn this lesson it has already been at the expense of others.

Phil & Liz
You can't "spank" a 16 year old girl or an 18 year old young man. As far as lessons being at the expense of others . . ., well then there will be consequences to that. That is what I mean by hard lessons. When mommy and daddy cannot or will not fix your mistakes.
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  #97 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 10:20 AM
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I agree with your view of the world Phil and Liz.
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Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Courage and perserverance have a magical talisman; before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into the air.

Pick your company wisely! Hang around people who are going to help you become all God created you to be.
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  #98 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 12:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IBCRUZIN'

Sometimes you just can't stop or control hormone-crazed young people. All you can do as a parent is pray and hope some of what you have drilled into their hard heads have stuck to one or two of their operating brain cells. If, after all the prayers and all the talks, they still don't listen, don't beat yourself up too much. One of the hardest job in the world is the job of parent to a teenager. Its tough.

And, sometimes, the best lessons learned are the hard ones you learn on your own.
IB - as seeing my stepdaughter graduate from high school, I couldn't agree with you more. Sometimes trying to control her was just hopeless, no matter what, and she did some of the stupidest things imaginable.

They actually teenage brains are incapable of realistically imaging what the future for them will be like. I know I was that way. I spent most of my early teens & twenties thinking "something" was just going to happen to get me through life (big recording contract as a musician, win the lotto, who knew...) - that's the way teens think.

I remember she had a boyfriend who saved her life by treating her just after being released for an infection (which she got from a piercing) which could have killed her. Her changed her dressing, cleaned & fed her for a month. The first day she goes back out to work, she decides not to come home to her boyfriend because some cute boy made a pass at her!!!! Can you imagine what everyone thought about that?

Her rationale? "Well, I guess if I could do that I must not have loved my boyfriend as much as I thought I did."

They always have a rationale - and in my opinion, the worst thing you can do (as my wife would) would be to say "I see your point, honey."

I would say, "what? That's insane! When you make decisions in life that affect your life, you don't do it with pure emotions. You have to reason things through."

Huh? PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. How many times have those words been uttered in these message boards?
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  #99 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 02:21 PM
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I was once told that there is some sort of chemical reaction in the brain of young adults and teens that truly makes them believe they are invincible and indestructable. I can't remember the phrase for it but one of my co-workers, who was studying psychology at the time, explained it to me.

They are not triggered to feel danger or iminent harm. They know right from wrong but the fear of pending disaster is completely lost on them.

Therefore, there is something "wrong" with the way young people think and yes, most are indeed crazy!!!!

P.S. For most people, this chemical reaction stops by the mid-20's.
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  #100 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 02:28 PM
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It is funny how times have changed over the past several decades on this issue. How many of our fathers or grandfathers went off to world war 2 at somewhere between eighteen or twenty years of age leaving behind their younger sweethearts (sometimes pregnant) who were somewhere between fourteen and eighteen?...Then they returned home to continue the courtship and eventually marry the girl often times while she was still under 18. It was often encouraged to court/marry at an early age for young ladies and to look for a somewhat older male who was thought to be more mature. They worried more about the maturity level of the individuals involved rather than a magic age number and how much divorce came out of it?...Almost none! Today, these sames guys would probably be locked up for this kind of thing....Hopefully the statute of limitations has run out so we don't have to open up a bunch of geriatric prison for all our grandpas! lol.
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  #101 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 02:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ready2board
It was often encouraged to court/marry at an early age for young ladies and to look for a somewhat older male who was thought to be more mature.
when our daughter got engaged to this guy (29) 10 years older than her she asked us, "is this OK? to get married this young?"

We said, "honey, there are no rules in life, it is what you make it, and if this is the right thing for you, which it appears to be, there is no right or wrong. it will work out if you want it to and you make it so. People got married at your age commonly in the past, so you are certainly ready, if you have the commitment in your heart to make it work."

So far, so good.

But yes, there are also studies that say people now are far less mature at 21 than they used to be. Kids stay at home with their parents who welcome them until they are 25 now. I was out the day I graduated from high school, and my parents said "good luck!"
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Old July 10th, 2007, 03:05 PM
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I took a class not long ago, and they said that the frontal lobe in the brain was the last to develop, so that would make sense in some of the things we often see.
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  #103 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 03:08 PM
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I just read a long article about that same thing, Luanne. It said that complete development of the frontal lobe doesn't happen until around 21-25. Explains a LOT!

Paul, I was the same way. High school over? Goodbye Mom and Dad. They waved fondly and wished me the best. I turned out okay (more or less).

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  #104 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 03:34 PM
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Paul:

You're right, I know first hand it can work with an age difference. I'm 42 and wife is 24....The scary thing is we're getting ready to go on our five year anniversary cruise! I can see everyone reaching for their calculators now lol

The funny thing is you just get caught up in the everyday life and marriage stuff to even think about the age difference most of the time.
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  #105 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 04:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ready2board
Paul:

You're right, I know first hand it can work with an age difference. I'm 42 and wife is 24....The scary thing is we're getting ready to go on our five year anniversary cruise! I can see everyone reaching for their calculators now lol

The funny thing is you just get caught up in the everyday life and marriage stuff to even think about the age difference most of the time.
Hmm. A 37 year old man marries a 19 year old. Interesting.

How old was your wife when you met her and started dating?
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  #106 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 04:10 PM
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19
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  #107 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 07:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ready2board
19
Good for you. Since there is no perfect formula for happiness, you two have the same chance as anyone else for a lifelong union.

Cheers to both of you!!!!!!
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  #108 (permalink)  
Old July 10th, 2007, 07:56 PM
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wow, the subject has changed on this thread.
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Old July 10th, 2007, 08:38 PM
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My mom was 14 when she and dad married - made it 69 years together before his death.

nowadays, apparently age diff is no factor since the divorce rate is what, about 50% ? Too easy to get divorced IMHO.
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Old July 10th, 2007, 11:32 PM
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At first I was reluctant to read this thread due to me being clueless as what to NOT say. On the other hand, some of you have shared some interesting perspectives. 8)
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Old July 11th, 2007, 07:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IBCRUZIN'
I was once told that there is some sort of chemical reaction in the brain of young adults and teens that truly makes them believe they are invincible and indestructable. I can't remember the phrase for it but one of my co-workers, who was studying psychology at the time, explained it to me.

They are not triggered to feel danger or iminent harm. They know right from wrong but the fear of pending disaster is completely lost on them.

Therefore, there is something "wrong" with the way young people think and yes, most are indeed crazy!!!!

P.S. For most people, this chemical reaction stops by the mid-20's.
Now we just need the AMA to declare it a "disease", get Pfizer or BristolMyersSquibb to make a pill, get Oprah to do a show on it and things will be ok again. Maybe that pill from the 60's Stepford Wives. Yeah that it thats the ticket!

Phil & Liz
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Old July 11th, 2007, 10:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thoth
At first I was reluctant to read this thread due to me being clueless as what to NOT say. On the other hand, some of you have shared some interesting perspectives. 8)
As long as you don't directly insult anyone and keep your language rated G or PG-13, you can voice your opinion no matter what that opinion may be.

As you may have noticed, this particular forum board does not condone, allow or ignore flaming, fighting, insults, profanity or the like.

Post away. We would love your input.

Happy Cruzin'
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Old July 11th, 2007, 01:57 PM
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My husband has always said that he wished he was as smart at 50 as he was at 17?????? Smart a## that is!!! Now he realizes that his parents were really not all that dumb. I guess all the brain has now developed!!!
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Old July 11th, 2007, 10:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IBCRUZIN'
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thoth
At first I was reluctant to read this thread due to me being clueless as what to NOT say. On the other hand, some of you have shared some interesting perspectives. 8)
As long as you don't directly insult anyone and keep your language rated G or PG-13, you can voice your opinion no matter what that opinion may be.

As you may have noticed, this particular forum board does not condone, allow or ignore flaming, fighting, insults, profanity or the like.

Post away. We would love your input.

Happy Cruzin'
Of course people strongly disagree over pre-martial sex and many strongly feel that "kids are going to do it anyway".
I didn't grow up with that view. Even when I was younger i was only interested in respectable girls. At the same time I see a growing trend away from personal responsibility.
The father of the girl should accepted much the blame for his daughter's mistake in that it appears he didn't discuss the sex issue with her over the years. The boy is not a victim. sounds like he wanted some action and he got it. Sometimes one gets more than they bargained for in the sexual arena. Perhaps his parents also share much of the blame for his poor behavior?
I've witnessed some bad stuff because nature is not fair to girls in a free sex scenario. It takes 2 to tango, but she's left to pay the band. There is an abundance of young men who use this advantage to hunt for a conquest. It is said that men can separate love from lust much better than women, I don't know but I think it is likely true. To her it's a interpersonal relationship, but to him conquest.
On cruises I have encountered younger women, usually with aid of too much tequila, who seem to be setting themselves up for date rape.
Yep, I'm a stuck in the mud....but that's OK. :evil:
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