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Old August 8th, 2007, 11:44 PM
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Default Why do some hate to dress for a formal night?

I can't understand why some people seem to have so many objections to a dress code for the formal dining rooms. Jeans are fast becoming accepted Before long anything goes will be the norm. Changing cloths for me is easy and quick especially on on cruise ship...shirt, trousers, coat, tie, shoes, socks, and account card. I thought gentlemen were expected to wear a tie to a quasi formal affair . Don't get me wrong if one wishes to wear shorts, T-shirts and flip flops to the Lido buffet, that's fine. But to dine at a restaurant where there are white table cloths and wine glasses on the table, I think a coat and tie is most appropriate. Part of the problem is that Western culture seems to no longer value the ways of the aristocracy/gentry/patricians. For some reason, we in the US now celebrate the plebeian subculture. Just look at the rubbish we watch on the TV. There is an effort to mainstream the plebeian ways. Is this affecting the cruise industry?
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Old August 9th, 2007, 12:31 AM
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Thoth,
I like to dress up because I don't normally have a reason to do so in my normal "mommy" life.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 06:06 AM
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I don't care to dress up because I don't feel comfortable in a dress, high heels, foundation garments, nylons, etc. I feel like a stuffed turkey and can't wait to get it all off after dinner.

I always run back to my cabin and change into shorts and t-shirt as soon as dinner is over, then go to the shows. I'm on vacation, I want to be comfortable.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 07:28 AM
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I alway try to wear shorts and a tee shirt in restaurants because that's the way plebeians are supposed to be.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 07:35 AM
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Thoth,
I couldn't agree with you more. My wife and I will be going ("FORMAL") on the Freedom in 8 days and we will "not" be changing after dinner !!!!!!
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Old August 9th, 2007, 07:41 AM
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Default Looking forward to it

As a first time cruiser I'm actually looking forward to it (tux and all), as a coach i spend most of my life in shorts and tee's. Besides, James Bond is cool right?? lol Now with that said-- At the risk of looking un-intelligent, what is a plebian?
Tom & Marie ( did we mention first time cruisers and can't wait!!)
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Old August 9th, 2007, 07:59 AM
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My personal opinion. I do plan on wearing nice clothes for formal night, but I do not own a tuxedo, nor a suit. I'll wear a nice button-down dress-shirt and tie with dress pants. Traveling solo, I don't think it's appropriate to rent a tuxedo I think it would be sad.

I won't wear a business suit because:
a] I don't own a business suit and,
b] I don't think a business suit is formal wear
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Old August 9th, 2007, 08:24 AM
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I'm looking forward to dressing up. Up until a few years ago I got the chance to dress up a couple of times a year for functions with hubby's work. Now he is in a new job and no nice Christmas party or celebrations, so no dress up. I just make sure that I have a comfortable, well fitting dress and heels are no problem to me. I LOVE heels.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 08:36 AM
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I can't find a suit that goes with my sandals!!!
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Old August 9th, 2007, 09:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cruisers
Thoth,
I couldn't agree with you more. My wife and I will be going ("FORMAL") on the Freedom in 8 days and we will "not" be changing after dinner !!!!!!
Isn't it difficult to sleep while wearing a bow tie?
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Old August 9th, 2007, 09:10 AM
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I think it's great that they give you so many options, if you don't want to dress up or can't for what ever personal reasons, it's my understanding (1st timer) that there are more than enough food options on the ship to make everyone happy.

On a personal note: I'm larger than the average woman, and I'm not able to find a formal dress in my size... However, I am going to wear slacks and a nice blouse and enjoy the magical moments on formal night with everyone else.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 09:30 AM
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I no longer pack a tuxedo for a cruise. The reason is that I have no reason to wear one in my regular life. There was a time that I would attend formal dinners or functions but those days are gone.

I will pack a dark suit for formal evenings and my wife will pack formal wear but given an option we prefer a country club casual atmosphere. This doesn't mean "jeans, shorts and flip flops at dinner". It means the current "casual" dinner wear throughout the cruise. You can add a sports jacket to the ensemble if you wish to dine at an alternative restaurant or "spruce up" your evening but you do not need to pack the closet for a seven day cruise.

If it is a longer cruise, the less you need to pack the better. I do believe you can still look good without wearing a tuxedo and a formal dress.

Take care,
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Old August 9th, 2007, 09:31 AM
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I'm with Judy on this one - I hate to dress up for anything other than a wedding or similar special event - I go on vacation to relax comfortably. When I just cruised with my teenage son, we were not interested in dressing formal. The next time I cruise, it will be solo, and I'll probably dress up for formal night but that will just be based on the circumstances of my cruise.

What makes me laugh is when people say "it ruins their ability to enjoy the formal atmosphere" when others dress down for formal night. Honestly, if you're all that concerned about what others think of you, and think that others "dressing down around you" will cause you to not enjoy your dressing up, how can you relax and enjoy your vacation or, for that matter, anything else in your life?

We are all entitled to enjoy how we choose to dress and what other people wear should not be an issue. It isn't for me.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 10:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tutak
Quote:
Originally Posted by cruisers
Thoth,
I couldn't agree with you more. My wife and I will be going ("FORMAL") on the Freedom in 8 days and we will "not" be changing after dinner !!!!!!
Isn't it difficult to sleep while wearing a bow tie?
I don't sleep while wearing my bow tie, if you know what I mean ?
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Old August 9th, 2007, 10:15 AM
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We just got back a few weeks ago from our first cruise on the Celebration. We are from southwest Virginia and my husband works in a warehouse all day long. Not a reason to have too many dress up clothes. Our friends are more experienced cruisers and wanted to do the dining room every night so with their suggestions we got him a couple of pairs of dockers and golf shirts for non-formal nights and a pair of dress pants, jacket, dress shirt and tie for formal night. Before the cruise he will tell you the dinners were the only thing he was really dreading about the entire trip. Now he will tell you the dining room experience was one of his favorite things on the whole trip. I work in an office so I'm used to dressing up (still got some new clothes of my own before the trip) and I'm a little more used to formal dining because of business lunches and trips. (Our company doesn't do any of the Christmas dinner things so he'd never had the experince) Anyway it was a little comical to see him set down the first night with all the silverware in front of him and our waiter, Valentino placing his napking on his lap. He loved it and had to have his picture made with Valentino on the last night. Bottom line was it gave him a chance to do something he had ever done and by keeping an open mind he found out not only was it not bad but really very nice. And on formal night we went up to have our pics made of the entire family. We had kept with a black and red color scheme with our clothes and the photographer at the piano scene took the best pictures. If we had rushed back to our room and immediately changed I would not have the beautiful family picture we now have proudly displayed on a canvas in our living room. We moved on to another scene and before the photographer snapped the shot of the two of us my husband popped out a ring box and presented me with the most beautiful ring. The photographer captured it all, complete with my mouth wide open in surprise :o and my husband grinning because he really surprised me! THe pics were great and we were the talk of the picture gallery when we went the next night to view them. We loved the entire cruise and are so glad we decided to dress up for dinner every night. I hope they always keep the dining rooms "dress up". THere is always the buffet for those who don't want to dress but I really like the dining room experience.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 10:17 AM
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I think perhaps the word "formal" is scaring a lot of people. Tuxedos on formal night are becoming a thing of the past and I see fewer and fewer men wearing them. Dark suits or sports coat with shirt and tie are much more prevalent on formal nights. As far as "formal" clothes for the ladies, some women love going all out and long gowns are still very popular. However, I believe the trend seems to be towards dark, dressy slacks with a dressy shirt or jacket....much more comfortable and totally appropriate. For a 7 night cruise, I pack one pair of black, silky slacks, two dressy tops...no big deal, doesn't take up much room in my luggage. I have noticed that the teenagers and young adults are dressing much more appropriately on formal nights on the cruises that I have been on recently, especially the girls, congrats to them for taking the time to think about what they are going to wear on formal nights and they also get an opportunity to wear their "prom" dresses. No one needs to be afraid of "formal" night, relax, wear something appropriate but comfortable and have a good time...formal nights are a part of the total cruise experience and an experience that should be enjoyed not dreaded.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 10:46 AM
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I think it is more of the thought that you are on vacation and should be comfortable. I wear business casual all day and would much rather not do it while on vacation. It just seems like a half hearted attempt at dressing up for dinner to me.

I would like to see the ships keep just the formals night and the rest of the dinners would be casual. I LOVED the formal night and from reading the forum I think a majority of people do. (I went all out for out next cruise and bought a full length ball gown for the new years eve formal night.) I seems that most people really go all out for the formal nights because its fun Business casual is far from fun....
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Old August 9th, 2007, 10:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by adias.angel
I think it is more of the thought that you are on vacation and should be comfortable. I wear business casual all day and would much rather not do it while on vacation. It just seems like a half hearted attempt at dressing up for dinner to me.
Adias.angel

I wore a full suit and tie for more than twenty five years and though I feel comfortable in one it still feels like I'm "not" on vacation when I wear one.

I guess it comes down to what clothing makes you feel like you are no longer in your normal world. Cruises are an "escape".

Take care,
Mike
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Old August 9th, 2007, 12:22 PM
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We enjoy dressing up almost every night and we also choose to eat in the dining room every night. I usually wear at least a jacket and often a suit. I never wear a Tux on a non luxury lines or 7 day and under cruises though. My wife too enjoys dressing for the occasion. It’s not every day she gets to wear nice dresses to dinner and it makes her feel special. Every night on board is a special date night for us.

On the other hand we also understand those who don’t like to dress up. There are many personal and private reasons some don’t/cant dress up. Some don’t know the etiquette and it is a source of distress for them (something that shouldn’t happen on a vacation
). Some people just aren’t comfortable in suits. Some different sized or plus sized people may have trouble finding dress clothes that fit properly or that they feel/look good in. My wife is 4’10? tall and 95 pounds. She has a devil of a time finding proper formal dresses. Most dresses for her size are made for kids, are childish, or just don’t fit her properly. Dresses for girls that size don’t have provisions for bust or hips which my wife does have. Proper formal dresses are made for women 5'4" and above. Thank goodness we have friends who can sew and are close to large designer stores, but many people don’t have these options.

Also figure that some people have spent a lot of money for a cruise and may not have the additional cash for formal wear. I know many men who don’t own a suit (including one of my brothers). For many people it can be difficult to spend $1000 for a cruise, $500 in airfare, $500+ in (gifts, alcohol, excursions), and then spend $500+ more for dress clothes.

I do think people in dining rooms should, and currently do maintain a certain level of dress. For Carnival, NCL, etc dress pants/khakis a button up shirt and perhaps a tie is great and comfortable on most nights. I seldom see people wearing less than that at dinner. I do hope that those that like T-Shirts and Shorts will use the buffet and for the most part they do. I have only seen 2 guys dining in shorts and they were very out of place and it only happened 1 night. On the other hand I seldom see tuxedos on formal nights and think this is for the better. For me to pack multiple suits and my Tux for a 5-7 day cruise would be ridiculous. Expecting full formal wear on Carnival or other low cost lines is perhaps asking too much.
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Old August 9th, 2007, 12:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike M
Quote:
Originally Posted by adias.angel
I think it is more of the thought that you are on vacation and should be comfortable. I wear business casual all day and would much rather not do it while on vacation. It just seems like a half hearted attempt at dressing up for dinner to me.
Adias.angel

I wore a full suit and tie for more than twenty five years and though I feel comfortable in one it still feels like I'm "not" on vacation when I wear one.

I guess it comes down to what clothing makes you feel like you are no longer in your normal world. Cruises are an "escape".

Take care,
Mike
I could not have said this better.

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Old August 9th, 2007, 12:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike M
I guess it comes down to what clothing makes you feel like you are no longer in your normal world. Cruises are an "escape".Take care,
Mike
You hit the nail on the head there. Thats exactly it!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by new22003
I do think people in dining rooms should, and currently do maintain a certain level of dress. For Carnival, NCL, etc dress pants/khakis a button up shirt and perhaps a tie is great and comfortable on most nights. I seldom see people wearing less than that at dinner. I do hope that those that like T-Shirts and Shorts will use the buffet and for the most part they do. I have only seen 2 guys dining in shorts and they were very out of place and it only happened 1 night.
I love being in the dinning room and the food there. I wouldn't want to miss it for the world. I just want to still feel like I am in paradise in my sandels and shorts instead of feeling like I am heading to work.

Quote:
Originally Posted by new22003
On the other hand I seldom see tuxedos on formal nights and think this is for the better. For me to pack multiple suits and my Tux for a 5-7 day cruise would be ridiculous. Expecting full formal wear on Carnival or other low cost lines is perhaps asking too much.
Its not really expected. People on our cruise were wearing anything from business casual to a tux in the dinning rooms on formal night. I would hate to see formal night(s) go. It was so much fun
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Old August 9th, 2007, 01:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Solo1959
My personal opinion. I do plan on wearing nice clothes for formal night, but I do not own a tuxedo, nor a suit. I'll wear a nice button-down dress-shirt and tie with dress pants. Traveling solo, I don't think it's appropriate to rent a tuxedo I think it would be sad.

I won't wear a business suit because:
a] I don't own a business suit and,
b] I don't think a business suit is formal wear
Oh you will look fine !
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Old August 9th, 2007, 01:32 PM
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Thank you good people for NOT getting angry 8) This thread was not intended to hurt any one's feelings, but as a conversation piece. I used an adjective that I felt was not offensive in order to make a point about society in general. If anyone took it wrong, then my mistake.
That said, this board IS much classier than a competitor( :evil: ) site that I need not mention. That's why I visit here more often. 8)
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Old August 9th, 2007, 02:22 PM
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For us it isn't the dressing up once we are on the ship.
It is just the hassle of the extra luggage for clothes that will only be worn for a few hours once or twice on the cruise.
First cruise we did the fromal night and had an entire hanging bag with nothing except my suit, my wife's drsss, wrap, etc.. and both of our dress shoes.
2nd cruise was a last minute one and we said screw the extra bag and skipped the formal night and enjoyed the cruise even more.

Now we are debating what we want to do on our Glory cruise in less than a month.
We might just rent a tux through Carnival and try that and see how it goes.
If not, we might be living it up at the buffett again and loving it.

Bill
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Old August 9th, 2007, 03:35 PM
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I love comfort..I love to relax both at home and while on vacation. I went our cruise with the purpose of relaxing...and relax we did!! But I also like doing things out of the ordinary, a get away, seeing things people and places I have never been, and dressing up for a change! I had fun finding dress up stuff for me and my girls in preparation for the cruise. It was just as fun dressing up once a day! It was fun trying to walk gracefully down stairways in heels, head up like a Super Model! And even better was the family portrait of us all doodied up in nice duds...that might never happen again!
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Old August 9th, 2007, 11:19 PM
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Everyone buys their ticket knowing full well there are formal nights in the dining room. It isn't like the cruise line surprises you AFTER you sail.
So all the banter about not wanting / liking to dress for these nights, IMHO, is like buying a red car and complaining afterward that it is red. Well, the car maker ain't gonna quit making red cars.

FORMAL NIGHTS FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old August 10th, 2007, 12:52 AM
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I wear suits at least once sometimes twice a week so formal night for me is just fine. I look forward to formal nights because I get to "break out" the really nice suits reserved for special occasions. Plus I like the way DW looks when she goes formal. 8)
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Old August 10th, 2007, 04:56 PM
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For me, it's not so much about "formal night."

I look at my surroundings and wear what I think is fitting. If I were at a restaurant that had beautiful linens, cutlery and glassware, a waiter in formal dress, a piano player (some ships do) and generally beautiful surroundings (except for those awful grapes on the Miracle!), I wear a dress or black pants with a dressy top.

If I were eating at a chain restaurant, I would wear casual clothes. My parents taught me to act and dress accordingly in life. For ME, dressing is part of that lesson.

My standard is: what would I wear to a wedding that wasn't a formal affair? I sure hope no one shows up at my son's wedding in blue jeans!

But, it is a vacation and relaxing should be a main element, so to each his own.

dorothy
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Old August 11th, 2007, 02:37 PM
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last time hubby wore his suit was to a funeral 5 yrs ago.

were both medical professionals and wear our pajamas to work! I'm SO looking forward to dressing up but will be wearing khaki and black capris on 2 nights, dresses the rest and i have 3 formal wear incase i want to dress up and the upscale dining as well as both formal nights!


need to buy some spanxx (girls will know what i mean, guys can just stew on what i mean )
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Old August 12th, 2007, 09:58 AM
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I for one have always worn a suit on formal nights. For the record, I am 52 and do not like getting dressed up. On our last cruise I did wear a tux for my girlfriend. We bought the Ralph Lauren TUX at a yard sale for 50 cents. I had it cleaned and the pants altered for $19. It looked great.

I noticed when we walked down through the ship people would look at us and smile. It made me feel good being dressed up with a pretty girl on my arm.

If you are thinking about the tux or a suit and cannot afford one, go to the Goodwill, a thrift store or consignment shop. You might be surprised what you find. The best locations to look are close to the upscale neighborhoods.

Tux for $19.50
Shirt, bow-tie cuff links and cumberbun $20
The look your significant other gives you when you walk into the room. Priceless
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