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Old May 10th, 2002, 11:38 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 470
Default Funny of the day to brighten your lovely Saturday...

play on words




> >
> > 1. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is
> > two-tired.
> > 2. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead
> > giveaway).
> > 3. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a
> > banana.
> > 4. A backwards poet writes inverse.
> > 5. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In
> > feudalism
> > it's your count that votes.
> > 6. She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke
> > it
> > off.
> > 7. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
> > 8. If you don't pay your exorcist you get
> > repossessed.
> > 9. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
> > 10. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and
> > I'll show
> > you A-flat minor.
> > 11. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four
> > seconds.
> > 12. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is
> > fully
> > recovered.
> > 13. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would
> > result
> > in Linoleum Blownapart.
> > 14. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge
> > it.
> > 15. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down
> > under.
> > 16. He often broke into song because he couldn't
> > find the
> > key.
> > 17. Every calendar's days are numbered.
> > 18. A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it
> > taint
> > mine.
> > 19. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
> > 20. He had a photographic memory that was never
> > developed.
> > 21. A plateau is a high form of flattery.
> > 22. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison
> > was a
> > small medium at large.
> > 23. Those who get too big for their britches will be
> > exposed in the end.
> > 24. Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen
> > a mall.
> > 25. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
> > 26. When an actress saw her first strands of gray
> > hair she
> > thought she'd dye.
> > 27. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know
> > basis.
> > 28. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
> > 29. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
> > 30. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the
> > agony of de-feet.
> >
>

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