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Mark is back from Texas - but now wondering if I should send him back. We "tried" to do some gardening together today so finally he did the tomatoes in the back & I did the flowers in the front. Now w/o any blood shed - I am on the computer & he went fishing! Arrgh!
In 23 yrs of marriage & 25 yrs together we have learned that you don't do the following together:
Hang wallpaper
husband should NOT try to teach wife how to drive a stick shift
obviously gardening now
DITTO on the clothes shopping.
Buy a new vehicle....I think 4x4 (so I can get out, on snowy days, to shop for clothes without him!) AND he thinks bright, shiny, new, red sports car!
Grocery shopping...he buys tooooooo many snacks.
My then fiance taught me to drive a stick shift on his brand new TR 6 with a British racing clutch; next month we'll be married 34 years.
We used to hang wallpaper together, but now we can afford to have it done, and that hired paper hanger doesn't swear at me, not even once.
He's great at hanging art work, says "Where do you want this?", I point, and up it goes.
When we get lost on a driving trip, we don't do very well.
We love to be together, and like many of the same activities, but some things we've divided up: I cook, and he cleans up the kitchen; I buy all the clothes, and he keeps the cars gassed up and maintained; I plan the trips, and he drives the car; I coordinate the decortating, but he gets veto power.
I hung wallpaper up a stairway on scaffolding, with my 1st husband. It very nearly ended the marriage 6 years before it finally ended! He also tried to teach me to play tennis once. Never again. Ditto for the stick shift. Maybe it was just the marriage that was doomed! !!
On the other hand, James and I love to do everything together, and also give each other space when we need it.
If you really want to test your marriage and do MEAN really test it..go on a float trip together...Our church group went on a float trip(about 60 couples)..at least 50 had to have marriage counsling at the end of the trip..
re:..Float trip...in a canoe down our unspoiled Buffalo River...very little paddling and a lot of rapids.
I definitely vote for the wallpaper hanging....NEVER do that with your spouse!
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Mary Lou Scanlon
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Trying to *teach* each other something is bad news.
My dh was a tennis coach in college and tried to teach me to play tennis. Don't know why he was so mad....I just had ONE comment and it involved different approaches he could take to get the tennis racket into his different orafices.....
Who knew??
dorothy
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I agree with Big John on the float trip. My DH and I have gone on a float trip together for the last 10 years (Or more) and every we swear we will never canoe together again. (He leans too much)
Grocery shopping we go to Walmart and he heads in one direction and I head toward the food section with my list. He shows up toward the end. If he shows up early I send him after what I missed - just so he won't fill the cart with "snacks". Usually I don't see them till we are at the check out and he just gives me those puppy dog eyes!!!
Diet together! All I keep saying is "no" I don't want to "split" that. "No" we can't eat that. "no" I don't want to buy that...
Our marriage survived paper hanging, float trips, grocery shopping,all of the above without any problems. Things do get a little dicey when we try to go on vacation and drive together, particuarly if we get lost.
I'm not sure it will survive his retirement. Thank the good lord I am still working and will be for several more years. I may never quit.
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Ah yes, those fabulous driving trips...forgot about those. Our first trip through Portland in evening rush hour in the pouring rain was not fun. Someone almost took Amtrak back to Vancouver (BC) <G> We can laugh now but it wasn't very funny then.
We missed an exit and crawled through the business district downtown. Could have gotten a good rate at the Hilton, but NNOOOOO someone wouldn't pay $18 for parking overnight-UGH! After we calmed down we got a motel (stinky room-had to go to the mall and buy a scented candle ) by the Convention center for the same price. But hey, free parking :-)
But it's been all uphill since then (Trying to get to the zoo in Seattle preceded that one).
Have you had a conversation like this?
Driver: How close are we to "such and such street"
Map-reader: I don't know, where are we now?
Driver: We are on "this" street at "that" street"
Map-reader : Where's that on the map?
Driver: It should be the one in red going north-south
Map-reader: Don't yell at me, don't you know where you're going?
Driver: What, like I've been here before?
The rest of the conversation has been deleted as it's not worth repeating and this is a family site<VBG>
My hubby told me to add one - we can NOT work on the computer at home together! We are both trying to click different areas or telling each other what to click on - it is not pretty!!! Debbie
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Don't do together if married
!!
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