Inside every older person is a younger person -- wondering what the hell happened.
-Cora Harvey Armstrong-
Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut the ***** up with cookies.
The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
-Helen Hayes (at 73)-
I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being, hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
Old age ain't no place for sissies.
A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.
The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
Every time I close the door on reality, it comes in through the windows.
Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
I try to take one day at a time -- but sometimes several days attack me at once.
If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they called ME slow!
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb -- and I'm also not blonde.
If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman.
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.
-Zsa Zsa Gabor-
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.“
Thanks Cruz2..I read these this morning while I was drinking my coffee and Marsha was reading the paper. When I read the 2nd one..we both spit coffee at each other.
She told me to read them to myself until she got thru.>VBG<