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Old December 18th, 2004, 01:15 AM
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Y2C Y2C is offline
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Default Walmart application

Supposedly this is an actual WAL-MART job application that a 75 year old senior citizen
submitted to Wal-Mart in Arkansas. They hired him because he was so honest and
funny.



NAME: George Martin

SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least, one who'll cooperate).

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's
available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.


DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style
severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it
notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p. m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU
FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do You
have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may
already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell Me.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no, on my breaks - no.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas
with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST
OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh Yes, Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Sagittarius
.
.
.

Round trip San Francisco Mex Riv, Mercury May 4, 2005


Sea of Cortez on Ryndam 9-28-2005


Round trip Los Angeles to Hawaii, Summit March 26, 2006
.



Post Edited (12-18-04 00:18)
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Old December 18th, 2004, 01:28 AM
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Default Re: Walmart application

LMAO
Wouldn't we all like to be in the Bahamas right now eh?

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Old December 18th, 2004, 01:31 AM
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Default Re: Walmart application

ROFL..where DO you get this stuff steve...thanks for the chuckle.

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Old December 18th, 2004, 05:14 AM
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Default Re: Walmart application

I have seen this before and it is still funny. Hmmm......... I am job hunting...................I wonder if ths would work for me...............


Cruznut2

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Old December 18th, 2004, 09:48 AM
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Default Re: Walmart application

Arkansas you say? BigJohn....what have you been up to?.....
Steve that was hilarious, thanks for making me smile this morning!

donna

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Old December 18th, 2004, 10:00 AM
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Default Re: Walmart application

Donna..I think that guy got the job and works at our Wal-Mart..lololol

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Old December 18th, 2004, 07:13 PM
Lynne &Trevor
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Default Re: Walmart application

Trevor should have tried this. He applied and didn't even get a call back! Their loss. He starts his training at the Bank on Monday!
Thanks for posting this. This guy would surely add some spice to the Staff! Lynne

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