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  #1 (permalink)  
Old January 25th, 2005, 06:01 PM
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Default Alcohol Warnings

Due to increasing products liability litigation,
American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may be a major factor in getting your ass kicked.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel gode.

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Old January 25th, 2005, 07:39 PM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

!!

Wait a minute, I've been there!

Ed

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Old January 25th, 2005, 07:53 PM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

From my younger wilder days there were a few that I could relate to as well, But we won't tell anyone now will we?

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Old January 26th, 2005, 05:27 AM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

Ispend a lot of time with people with developmental disabilities, I had not noticed they dance any worse then anyone else.

Cruznut2

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Old January 26th, 2005, 08:01 AM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

Cruznut2, I was a little sensitve to that one too. "There but for the Grace of God go I".
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Old January 26th, 2005, 08:54 AM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

I kinda thought they should have used the reference of dancing like Elaine Bennet from Seinfeld for that one.

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Old January 26th, 2005, 09:03 AM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

funny
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Old January 26th, 2005, 10:23 AM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

I'm sending this post to a few friends who *might* need to know some of them!

dorothy

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Old January 26th, 2005, 12:58 PM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

I'll drink to that >staggering around room<
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Old January 26th, 2005, 06:40 PM
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Just between the two of us................I think I've experienced all those except the bra and panties <wink>

regards,
Thomas
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Old January 26th, 2005, 07:05 PM
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Default Re: Alcohol Warnings

You got pregnant?

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Old January 27th, 2005, 10:10 AM
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ROTFLMOA!! She got ya Thomas! Actually the problem might be why you wake up WEARING a bra and panties. <VBG>
Jim

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