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  #1 (permalink)  
Old October 14th, 2005, 10:08 AM
Senior Member
Admiral
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 11,518
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Default First Date

>
>
>
> --- >We have all had bad dates...but this takes the cake, only in Utah.
>
>
> This just tells you how tough it is to be single nowadays. This was
on
the
> "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to find the
most
> embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described
her
> worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to
why
> her
> tale took the prize!
>
> She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and the guy had

> taken
> her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah.
>
> It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and

> truly
> had never met before.
>
> The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
home
> late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when
she
> gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra
latte.
>
> They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in
the
> middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which
she
> did
> for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going,

> there
> came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her
pee
> beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
>
> They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her
pants
> down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so
she
> let
> her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.
>
> Her companion stood on the side of the car, watching for traffic and

> indeed
> was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think
about
> was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of
the
> situation.
>
> Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation.
As
she
> bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks
were
> firmly glued against the car's fender.
>
> Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind
as
she
> attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly
> apparent
> that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.
>
> Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment,
she
> answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
reply
> that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some
> assistance!"
>
> He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her
sweater
and
> then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out
laughing.
>
> She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose
> themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
>
> Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced
with a
> real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her
chilly
> cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had
gotten
into
> the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there
was
> only one way to get her free.
>
> So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to
unzip
> his
> pants and pee her butt off the fender.
>
> As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize

> hands
> down.... or perhaps that should be "pants down."
>
> .........and you thought your first date was embarrassing!!!!
>
> Jay Leno's comment ....
> "This gives a whole new meaning to being "pissed off."
>
>
>
> --- >
>
>
> --- >
>

>
>
> --- >
>
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old October 14th, 2005, 11:12 AM
Tide Pride's Avatar
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Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 635
Default

This has to be the funniest story I have heard in years. Thanks for posting.

Regards,
Ben
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  #3 (permalink)  
Old October 14th, 2005, 11:59 AM
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First Mate
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hot Springs Village, AR
Posts: 432
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Luanne that is PRICELESS!!! What a great way to start the day. Tears are still coming down my cheeks. Thank you so much for the posting.
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Old October 14th, 2005, 01:15 PM
bigjohn461's Avatar
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Location: Hot Springs, Ark.(just below farrimco
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ROFL...I am sure it would not be so funny though if it were my patooty on the bumper.....I know that date was special.

EDITED: Could she have been called "sticky buns"?
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Old October 14th, 2005, 01:46 PM
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PIMP!! (get it??) tee-hee
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Old October 14th, 2005, 03:00 PM
JeanS's Avatar
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Location: So. California
Posts: 1,494
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Oh my gosh, that is just WAY too friggin funny!!!
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Old October 14th, 2005, 09:54 PM
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I think I would have married the guy lol. Quick thinker!

ttfn Jennifer
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Old October 15th, 2005, 09:13 AM
BW BW is offline
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Location: Moncton, N. B.,
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Hilarious!!!

We had somewhat of similar experience a few years ago. We were travelling in the dessert with another couple when nature called and she had to relieve herself and went in the bush. Low and behold, she squatted and her buttocks came in contact with a plant (don't know the name) and she had several needles stuck to her rump.

Her husband had to remove the needles.

Not quite as funny as your story but, 25 years after, we still laugh about it.

Bill
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Old October 15th, 2005, 10:35 AM
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GREAT STORY!! Can't wait to tell the lovely Mrs. Jones. THanks
Ken
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Old October 15th, 2005, 01:13 PM
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That was so funny. Good thing I'm alone right now or my family would think I had lost it, as I was lauging so hard. Thanks
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