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Old October 26th, 2005, 12:34 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: metrowest area of Massachusetts
Posts: 2,249
Default First a big thanks, then need to vent a bit

I would first like to thank everyone who was concerned about my kids during Hurricane Wilma. It meant alot to having caring people think about their well being, and mine, during this time. I was very nervous until they got home and then again when they were traveling back. It feels great to have such caring and kind people in my life. Thanks for being there for me, again.

Now for the venting. I know some of you have read posts about my relationship with in-laws. Well this vent also includes my brothers as well. Not one of my family members (except my parents) or my in-laws called or e-mailed us to find out what was going on with the kids. I was very hurt by this. My DH thinks we should have called everyone to let them know that the kids were coming home. I feel that if they really cared about the kids safety, they would have called us. His family, in particular, think we are bragging when we talk about the number of times we travel back and forth to Florida. This is another reason why I didn't want to call them. Also, it's his family, why didn't he call them? (as for my brothers, my parents did let them know but they never called anyway) I still don't know if his family knows the kids were even home.

Oh well. As the old saying goes---"You can pick your friends but not your family.

Cheryl C.
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Old October 26th, 2005, 12:57 PM
TBug's Avatar
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Michigan
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Are you sure you're not talking about my family? Sounds like what I deal with all the time. You just get to the point that you say to yourself, "why do I bother?"

You have to know that you are doing right. Do know better, and do do the best you can. The rest of it, you just can't worry about.

I could tell from when I first starting posting here that you were special. Even though I never met you, I could tell that one day I wanted to meet you and I know I will.

I think just about everyone have family or in lawas that we say, "did we come from the same parents?"

Hope it made you feel better to vent. You have friends. Even new one like me.


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Old October 26th, 2005, 01:36 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Orlando, FL, USA
Posts: 1,772

People, including family members, can be pretty thoughtless at times.
We all know that, Cheryl. So you can't be blamed for being upset and a bit hurt when your own families don't show reasonable concern for the safety of your kids. They may be concerned, but you'll never know it for sure if they don't express that concern at the time it's most needed and appreciated.

I feel lucky not to be in that same boat myself. Even though we live in Orlando, many miles away from the path that Wilma took, we were besieged by phone calls and emails from our kids, grandkids and others up north checking on our status. It was very much appreciated, as you can readily understand.

Maybe it's because we are of the senior generation, and folks think that we need more TLC or something. But it still felt good. Don't be too hard on your kinfolk, Cheryl. Sometimes people simply don't think! Shake it off, and know that lots of your CM friends did care and did express their concern for your situation and that of your dear children. We're glad to hear that they're okay.

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Old October 26th, 2005, 10:44 PM
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Location: Caribou River, Nova Scotia
Posts: 17,607

Who needs family when you've got friends like us?
Glad everyone is Ok, and you can rest your mind now.

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Old October 27th, 2005, 06:05 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Bills Country, NY
Posts: 2,157

I can relate to your plight, but through the years, I have learned that no news is good news. I usually catch up on family news on Fridays when we go visit my mother. Usually my brother who lives in the same city is there and we catch up on things. Sometimes we are the last to know about certain happenings, but I just shake my head and laugh.

They do care... some people have a hard time expressing it though.

Let's Go Buffalo!

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Old October 27th, 2005, 07:31 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,638

I'm sorry to hear that you family seemed unconcerned. It is a hard situation sometimes. I get frustrated by our families too. Sometimes I think it would be easier to live far away.

Keep hanging in there!
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Old October 27th, 2005, 08:52 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: metrowest area of Massachusetts
Posts: 2,249

Thanks again everyone for your kind words. I have been involved in my DH's family for over 25 years (4 unmarried and 21 married). I always think I will get used to them but I guess not. I don't mind them being disrespectful to me but it hurts deeply when it involves my kids.

As for my brothers, them I am used to.
Cheryl C.
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Old October 27th, 2005, 06:25 PM
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Location: Texas
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I can so relate to this problem. I had the parents everyone wanted. Only problem was there were two sides to them. I realized you have to do what is best for you and your kids, no matter what it is.

Thinking of you Cheryl!!

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Old October 27th, 2005, 06:40 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Haverhill, Ma.
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Default First a big thanks - then need to vent

I understand your exasperation with "family" It is an endless cycle that most of the time cannot/will not be resolved. Acceptance of how they are is the only solution. My brother was an only child, but over the years well, that's just the way it is. So glad your kids are fine and you must be a fantastic mom.

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