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life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 12:58 PM

Ageism,racism,sexism,etc,Chit-chat or blatent discrimination

Kuki March 23rd, 2008 01:21 PM

First off... welcome to CruiseMates. And delighted that you chose to post and join in the discussions.

I'm on the boards A LOT and it's VERY rare to find any posts which are discrimminatory in any way.

However, if there are posts which any reader find offensive there is a Report a Post feature, to click on and report such posts.

Now... what one person may take offense from is not necessarily something that is removed, unless it is a violation of our Terms of Service.

People are allowed to voice their opinions, even if some may find them controversial. If posts are made soley for the purpose of being disruptive, or are personal attacks they are deleted.

No question, some people can be harsh in what they believe and how they express those opinions, but if they aren't personal attacks , whether they are right or wrong, it is acceptable to post them in response to a conversation or to express a differing opinion.

I think it's interesting that most complaints about cruising are actually complaints about other cruisers actions, rather than about issues with the cruise lines.

nlb1050 March 23rd, 2008 01:31 PM

You make some valid points. But unfortunately this is not the only forum that you will find these kind of comments.

You just have to try to ignore comments like that. When I see these I just skip over them and go on to other posts. I have been a member here for a while and though I don't post much I do check the board every day. There are a few poeple that I have never really found that i agree with anything they have said I must admit that I will read some of thier posts depending on the subject.

You will find that most of the people that have made posts that you have found apalling are really very nice and can be very helpful with any questions you may have. And be sure that the moderators have and will continue to delete posts that are truly offensive. The ones you have quoted are opions and while I do not agree with most of what is stated none have crossed the line. I have not read all of the threads for each of those posts but you may find that some posts have been edited either by the poster or by a moderator.

I hope that you are able to keep coming here and either asking questions of giving answers that will be of help to others.

rollerdonna March 23rd, 2008 01:44 PM

Welcome "Life'saBeach" and thanks for posting your observations.
Keeps us moderators on our toes!

Like Kuki said, people are entitled to their opinions, right or wrong, as long as they don't violate our Terms of Service, or personally attack another poster. Past posters have been deleted and/or banned for such violations, and we do try to keep up with any new ones.

These boards are a great place to hang out, but sometimes you either have to ignore, or have a thick skin if you are to stick around.
That being said, I have been here over 5 years, and it is my favourite place to be (when I'm not on a cruise!).
Generally, the people here are wonderful, friendly, helpful, and caring.
Glad to welcome you to the family!


rescuedad March 23rd, 2008 01:58 PM

I think kuki is correct regarding the last paragraph of his post. I, personally, would cruise with anyone, until their actions changed that. You should know the moderators do a decent job of monitoring the boards and deleting offensive posts. I speak from personal experience! LOL

katlady March 23rd, 2008 02:01 PM

Okay I have to defend myself here. Your thread is entitled Ageism, racism, sexism, etc, Chit-chat or blatent discrimination.
Here is my comment.
"We don't cruise the holidays because there are more childern during the holidays. We don't have any so why should we put up with other people's screaming brats on our vacation."
Under which of these do you feel this falls? I don't like cruise during a time a lot of kids will be present. Because some parents don't have control of their kids.

I'm a little offended you would put my comment under a thread entitled with things like racism and blatent discrimination. I don't feel I'm those things. I'm honest, I won't change that to make everyone happy because in the end that is not possible to make everyone happy.

Trip March 23rd, 2008 02:22 PM

Hi, and welcome to the diverse world of Cruising, & Cruisemates. As mentioned, we certainly strive to make the boards an amiable place to be. It's also a place to give an opinion. It may not be my opinion as a moderator, but if it has not crossed the lines of terms of service, it stays.

I hope you will continue to use the boards a a learning tool for your October cruise. Lots of valuable info here, and its given with enthusiasm and appreciation of cruising:)

life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 02:37 PM


venice March 23rd, 2008 02:41 PM

you live in England correct ?

life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 02:48 PM


life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 03:35 PM


venice March 23rd, 2008 03:55 PM

you bring a different perspective to the forum which I think is very valuable...

Kuki March 23rd, 2008 03:57 PM


My bug bare is the feelings of new members particularly.
All new members are always welcome. The VAST majority of posts on the message boards are useful and helpful cruise information, where the members of the community voluntarily exchange first hand information about cruising.

However, with the thousands and thousands of people who post on the boards, one would be naive to think they aren't going to encounter views that differ from their own.

Afterall, that's why there are so many different cruise lines, with different approached in existance. Not everyone is looking for the same things in their vacation experiences. And not everyone will be satisfied the same way, even in interpersonal reactions onboard.

One shouldn't take offense with "derogative comments", because often they are only judged so from your own perspective. If people think the comments are unfair and have a reasonable arguement to make everyone should feel free to join in the discussion. Those types of discussions are helpful and part of the purpose of the boards.

Labelling those opinions we don't agree with using "tags" just tries to sterotype them, rather than discuss the issues.

All of that said.... to post on public boards where there's bound to be differing opinions does take a combination of bit of a thick skin, and a bit of patience for people who may not agree with all your own points of view.

AR March 23rd, 2008 04:26 PM

Thank you for posting, life's.

I think it is always good idea for all of us to stop and "see ourselves as others see us." Plus, I think your overall point is well taken, even though the great majority of the regulars here are fine people.

One of the good things about this place is that if you stick around, you won't be a newcomer for very long!

Welcome, and cheers.

life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 06:21 PM


Irish March 23rd, 2008 06:28 PM

I just want to say about the Brat comment. Both of my boys are Brats and are very well adjusted grown men of 22 and 26. If you ask them, they will tell you that they are very proud be Brats....Army Brats.

Irish 8)

Kuki March 23rd, 2008 06:42 PM


The comments on not cruising with blacks, was I believe, a
Actually you are absolutely correct about that particular post. It was unacceptable, and has been removed. I hadn't seen it. Nor, obviously had any moderators.

We cant read every post, and we do rely on people to help us by using the Report A Post feature. Some obviously do get through if no one points them out.

The others you've quoted, while maybe unfeeling and thoughtless, don't seem to be rascist, or defaming, or personal attacks.

Inis46 March 23rd, 2008 07:36 PM

Welcome life'sabeach to what I feel, along with hundreds of other cruisers, to the best cruise forum on the net! Our moderators do a fantastic job and keep things going smoothly for us all. With that said, you will see after you've been here for awhile, that many posters have a certain style or wit about them and it will reflect in their postings. Although, some subjects or attitudes are NEVER accepted or condoned, if they are offensive. This particular board kind of self-monitors potential problem posters in addition to relying on our fair and helpful moderators.....we just simply ignore them by not acknowledging their posts and their rantings.....

arkiegal March 23rd, 2008 07:55 PM

Thanks Inis for putting into words what I was thinking. I, too, find most of the quoted posts offensive and I could quote a few others as well, but I just "consider the source" and ignore it. My DH and I also generally try to cruise when few children will be aboard, but I would never classify all children as screaming brats. I find that the main problem with most children who are offensive to others is parents who take them into situations they are not old enough for and then refuse to supervise them.

I hope our newbie won't let the ill-considered comments of a few keep her from enjoying a site that is generally helpful and supportive.

Marc March 23rd, 2008 08:47 PM

I agree with the OP. Too much of the Gripes board are "gripes" about fellow cruisers rather than gripes about a cruise ship, a cruise line, a cruise port. or other cruising topics. There has also been an increase in "baiting" topics just designed to incense others. I don't sign up to the argument that just because it occurs on other boards, it should occur here.

venice March 23rd, 2008 08:51 PM

how did I miss that post :shock: :shock:

the "regular" posters are usually sensitive to each other..a new poster or a poster that likes to start "crap" then disappears is harder to monitor and is not reflective of the majority that post on a frequent basis

venice March 23rd, 2008 09:03 PM

I like your "handle" Ms L.A.B....I encourage you to join us on the BLOG2NOLA cruise next Feb out of my home city New Orleans, where you will (and so will I), have the opportunity to meet over 200+ CM'ers and bond... LOL and put in practice "why can't we all get along for a 5 day cruise"

life'sabeach March 23rd, 2008 09:36 PM


rollerdonna March 23rd, 2008 10:22 PM

Life'sabeach, I'm glad to see you have a sense of humour! LOL
And while we're on the subject of cruising without kids, that is the reason I cruise, to get away from the kids I work with (pre-schoolers in daycare).
My own kids never cruised until they were almost adults, so I can say they were never brats on a cruise.
Yes, I said brats. Generally, I'm pretty tolerant of kids anywhere, and actually enjoy them. But it's the parents who don't supervise them or discipline them who need the wakeup call!

May I also say you have 2 beautiful children, and I absolutely love your daughter's dress! Once you get to know me, you'll realize I am the QUEEN of PURPLE!!


thecruisequeen March 23rd, 2008 11:01 PM

Welcome Life! :D

Beautiful children! :D They look to be close in age.

Which cruiseline are you cruising with in October? :D

venice March 23rd, 2008 11:23 PM

ah fly Air Lingus to New York and Jet Blue to New Orleans and Kuki will pick up the tab for your expenses :rofl:

katlady March 23rd, 2008 11:30 PM

Okay I will give you that my comment was "coarse" and oddly enough my next cruise will be with my nine year old nephew who has his moments. As all kids do.:wink: My brother is autistic and was hyperactive as a child so there were times my mom was looked at as someone who couldn't keep their child under control. So I'm not as judgmental as the comment suggests. Next time I will state; "I would not cruise on holidays. Because I won't want to be on cruise with the many kids, some of which are not well mattered."
My real issue was my comment being including with other comments, I never say or beleive like the comment from Pacificheights which I feel is way worse then my coarse comment. I'm waving the white flag of truce.

venice March 23rd, 2008 11:50 PM

sometimes a group may charter a ship and if they cannot sell all of the cabins within 30-45 days there may be a clause in the contract that allows the cruise line to sell to the general public on a last minute cabin sale and if the cruise line doesn't advise the general public about who the majority group onboard, it could cause some interesting situations..

this actually happen to me several years ago and it turned out to be alot of fun for me (it was open up for interline bookings only)

my parents always taught me about being careful for what you ask for..for those posters that insisted who they "won't cruise with" or "would not want to be on a cruise with alot of_____ (you can fill in the blanks). they just might find theirself in that situation one day and I don't think trip insurance covers "personal biases or preferences"

smart cruisers know you don't cruise Disney if you don't like being around alot of small children, you don't take a 85 day world cruise if you want an active party night life etc

rescuedad March 24th, 2008 12:11 AM

I think it might be best for me to not post any further on this thread. I have already had enough posts deleted. Responding in this thread would be like a ball sitting on a tee with a wide open fairway for me. But, shouldn't this thread be in the gripes section?

Kuki March 24th, 2008 12:49 AM


But, shouldn't this thread be in the gripes section?
Do you mean the Cruise Gripes section.

This thread was a new member posting comments about the site, and what their perspective of it was, and what other first timers might see it as when they visit.

I think it's a very helpful post and thread. People need to know there are thousands of visitors to the site each day who don't post and arent registred. And sometimes I do think we need to be reminded it's a public cruise site, not a clubhouse.

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