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  #1 (permalink)  
Old December 30th, 2003, 08:34 AM
Sarah1974
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Default Social Life among crew

I have heard so many stories, its hard to tell whether they are bullshit or not. Sexual harassment, sex for computer use, officers being the worst of the bunch. Doesn't anyone take their jobs seriously? I am really concerned that I signed up for the "girls gone wild" cruise job from hell. I want to know if anyone has a normal cruise experience where the crew is not just interested in sex and hooking up and harassing others. Is there anything else to look forward to????
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Old January 6th, 2004, 09:40 PM
apryl
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

heya,

I just wanted to know if u got a response from this ad. Im also curious cause im about to start sending out my applications, and I hadnt heard that much about it. Have u already got a job lined up?

many thanks
apryl
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Old July 30th, 2004, 01:18 AM
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Wow! What a story. Sorry to hear that you had such a bad experience NS. I would have to agree with alot of what you said. Most crew members that have relationships with passengers only do it for the week. The passenger is only there for a week, and then a ship full of new people to get to know arrives. I would think it would be extrememly difficult for any passenger to have a real relationship with a crew member. However, I believe Sarah's question was in regards to becoming a crew member herself, and the relationships that develop amongst the crew.

Sarah, some of what you've heard is very true. I definately wouldn't compare it to "Girls Gone Wild". It's nothing that extreme. Nowhere near that extreme. But relationships do take place between crew members. Some are actual relationships full of emotion, and some are just sexual experiences. Like anyplace in the world, you'll find people to fit every mold. It does tend to be a much wilder atmosphere than most people are accustomed to. It tends to take a very outgoing person to live and work on a ship for long periods of time. Also you have to take into consideration that the crew come from all over the world, and lifestyles are different everywhere. Alot of cultures are very open about sex and sexuality. So there will be some people that don't view it the way you do. Also, there is alot of down time on a ship when there's not much to do. So most crew do alot of drinking and heavy partying, which can sometimes lead to other things.

Yes the officers tend to be the most aggresive. I don't really know why. I have my opinions. I think it has a lot to do with their cultures. It's very common for men to be very forward toward women where most of them are from. I also think it has something to do with their positions. Their in positions of authority and therefore I would think have much more confidence and much less fear when it comes to doing what they want (i don't know if that made any sense).

All that being said, don't sweat it. I wouldn't worry about at all. No matter where you go in life, you'll always find people similar to yourself that you can relate to. There will be plenty of them working on the ship. No one will harrass you. Always remember that people will push you only as far as you allow them. So as long as you let it be known who you are, then you'll be fine. People that sleep around and live that lifestyle tend to find each other. NO ONE IS GOING TO CONSTANTLY HARRASS YOU. DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT. Go and have fun. You are who you are. You're the same person on land as you are on a ship. People tend to use "shiplife" as a way to rationalize their wild behavior. Just turn away from those people and have fun with those that you get along with. There's plenty of amazing people working on ships. You'll love it, and it will definately change the way you look at the world. There are so many cultures to learn from.

I spent years working on ships. So if you have any questions I'll try and help relieve your worries. You can also find out alot from reading past threads in this forums. There's alot of info in there. Alot of peope have asked questions before, and I'm sure many of your's are similar. Good luck and let me know if i can help.
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Old September 4th, 2004, 03:57 AM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

in response to NS. everytime i went on a cruise i noticed that the girls that fell for the advances of carribean boys were all FAT & UGLY . im not saying u r. im just saying that if ur not given much attention during ur day to day life and suddenly a handsome well build blck man is all over you, a lot of girls fall for it.

the hot girls never fell for this, and if advances were made the were quickly shut down.

i guess its like on_the_water said, someone will push you as far as your willing to be pushed.

personnally, im up for fun 24/7 and love mingeling with everyone i meet.

cheers

Paul
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Old September 4th, 2004, 02:03 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Don't you just love the exchange of ideas, views and conclusions. I shall reserve the right to keep my opinions to myself. Afterall, 14 years of working onboard Cruise Ships just doesn't qualify me to be an authority in this field. Thank GOD, I work way down below. Unfortunately, when I talk to the Meat and Fish...they never answer back. Hope you all have a warm and cozy day ahead of you... CHEERS !!!

THE ICEMAN
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Old September 4th, 2004, 04:46 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Hey Iceman, I bet you didn't spend all of your time in the freezers with the fish and meat.
I'm not going to fall for THIS line.HaHA...cheers!!!!!
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Old September 5th, 2004, 12:12 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Bee Dee,

Which line are you referring to? I do spend a lot of time inside my various freezers and chillers. Afterall, its my job. Come to think of it, I reckon that I'm pretty fortunate coz I don't have to mingle with Guests. I don't have to face their constant complaining and would not have to fear the possibility of being sexually harassed whatsoever. So, I really don't know what line you were referring to really.


THE ICEMAN
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Old September 5th, 2004, 12:32 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Just trying to make a small joke which, apparently, fell flat.. No offense meant.
cheers!!!!!!!!!
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Old September 8th, 2004, 03:08 AM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

it comes down to one thing folks.... RESPECT.

if your 32, dont invite a 17yr old back to your quaters.
dont force someone or put them into a akward position and always be respectfull.

if you do this, your going have fun.

i start my first cruise shortly and should i meet someone i like, i fully intend to date.

i worked in 5 star hotels for the last few yrs, and the same rules applied, its frowned upon for staff to date or fratinize with patrons of the hotel. but it ahppened all the time. and the people that were respectfull had no problems.

i did see a few people get fired in my time, but they deserved. co workers and i could always tell if someone was going to get fired, within 2 days of meeting them.

they were sleazy and bragged a lot. it was bvound to happen.

remember...
show respect and have fun.

its easy.
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Old September 8th, 2004, 12:36 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Hey Paul ... good to hear that you're doing things the right way. BUT... the working atmosphere onboard the Cruise Ship is very different from the working atmosphere even on a 5 star hotel. Once you're onboard, give it 2 - 3 days and you shall find it out, firsthand. Please bear in mind that ON LAND, you have the luxury of going home after your work shift is done. ONBOARD, you'll see the same people everyday of your contract duration ... even the people you dread, despise and avoid. Paul, always watch your back and play it by ear ... if you get my meaning.
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Old September 8th, 2004, 01:30 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

yeah dude, i hear you.

but just so u know, there were 50 of us that lived at the hotel. it was in a differnt counrty. so i got to experince a little bit of what its like. but i know fully that its gonna be different on board. my main bit of that post is no matter what u do, no matter what ur job is, no matter where you live and no matter who you meet, respect is very important. you treat people the way you want to be treated and im sure apryl and anyone for that matter will have a ball and have no issues on board a ship.

thanks for the tip foodstorekeeper....

peace everyone!
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Old September 9th, 2004, 01:45 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Paul,

Ideally, if you treat people with respect ... you expect to be treated the same way, right? But onboard the ship, things can be quite different, Mate. Trust me ... I've been working onboard various Luxury Liners for 14 years. Sexual harassment comes in all forms. Get a hold of this: your female boss likes you and wants you to make it out with her. What if she's not your type or you've got a girlfriend onboard and you decline her offer / advances? For refusing her, she gets back at you by complaining to the Staff Captain that you sexually harrassed her. Bear in mind that you don't have a witness to prove that you never harrassed her in any way. So, you lose the battle. You get yourself fired in a day or two. Where is the logic to it? This is but one example for you to consider, Mate. Think about it ...
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Old September 9th, 2004, 04:38 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

good thing im ugly...lol...

nah i hear what ur saying. i never thought of it like that.

im abig beliver in karma. so ill just keep doing what i do, and should i get fired for something i didnt do, theres nuffin i can do about that.

anyway., thanks for the advice mate.

cheers

Paul
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Old September 10th, 2004, 12:56 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Paul,

I merely told you something about things that do happen onboard the Cruise Ship. Of course, the boss could be Male and the Crew ... a female. Or if you're too efficient in your job and full of potential, others may feel threatened about your potentials. They may find a way to get rid of you - like, frame you for something you never did. These are but a few things I see happen onboard. No matter how simple you work and live your life onboard, there will always be a few "INSECURE" people onboard. Like what I said earlier ... always watch your back, Mate.

THE ICEMAN
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Old September 21st, 2004, 03:57 PM
crafter
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

My goodness! I never expected that just on the other side of my stateroom door, it was Sex and The Shipmates! My husband and I just came back from our first cruise and we never once saw anything like what you're describing. The crew were always so respectful and kind. There weren't very many young people onboard, but those who were never once were approached as far as I could tell. Just when/where/ what shipline is all this hanky-panky supposedly taking place?
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Old September 22nd, 2004, 02:03 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Harassment comes in all forms and shapes. Also, the Guests never get to hear incidents like this amongst Crew. Its more of an internal thing really. After 14 years onboard Cruise Ships, one gets to witness such incidents ... I kind of get used to it already. The important thing here ... is to watch your back. You won't lose anything by being careful, right?
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  #17 (permalink)  
Old October 4th, 2004, 10:31 AM
Jessica Page
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

When I went to work on cruise ships I was 18yrs old and a dancer in the production shows on board.....I never was harrassed I mean everyone has different ideas of harrasment but I would say I received less hassle on the ship that I did when I went out clubbing in London.....remember if you don't give out the signals you won't be bothered....you will be fine!
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Old December 5th, 2004, 10:56 AM
daiseee
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

One of you should write a book!!!
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Old December 6th, 2004, 09:11 PM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

As some others have pointed out, shipboard life is a closed socioty and everyone pretty much knows everyone elses business. I do not see any more sexual harrassment than any other jobs and rapes are also quite rare but like any group it sometimes does happen. Yes there will be a number of single people who will hookup with another person and you can bet everyone else knows who is sleeping with whom as well. Don't get the reputation and you shouldn't have any problems. If you do report them to your supervisor etc. The home office is pretty strict when it comes to these matters.
Jim

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  #20 (permalink)  
Old December 12th, 2004, 08:53 AM
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

Hey there

Well I have been Purser on CCL now for nearly 2 years.
I am on vacation now...can't wait to go back.

I think a lot of the things you have heard about ship life is myths.
Even about the officers. I wouldn't say the officers were aggressive in anyway! My god, most of them are very nice people. The most aggressive people I met were dancers and steiners!!!

Just remember what happens on land! Its the same thing!!

Don't come on here asking questions because you'll just scare yourself!
Go and do it for your self... if its not for you then quit!!

Good Luck!
and have FUN!!!

Emma x
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  #21 (permalink)  
Old August 27th, 2005, 12:17 AM
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Default Re: Re: Social Life among crew

hello emma !!i saw your message and i m curious to know more about the purser position.i ve been successfull with RCI,and i ll be a assistant purser,what is it really?thank you for giving me more information
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old August 29th, 2005, 11:53 PM
Becka
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Default Re: Social Life among crew

emma! are you british!? did you start as a cadet on the paradise?! i am a social host with carnival..but was a youth counsellor then and i think i know you!! let me know!

becka from canada!
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Old September 4th, 2005, 01:53 PM
Iona
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Default Re: Social Life among crew


In 2001 my second cruise aboard a great cruise line I was forced by a cruise
steward to have sex. They really must get frantic, if that's the word, as at
the time I was over sixty years of age. I was to scared to report him. bad
mistake! I have been on four cruises since then three of them solo and
never had that problem again...I will be going again, solo, this month.
I just wanted you to know,as you already do, that it does not only happen
among cruise members. I think you all do a wonderful job!
Thanks
Iona
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