Refusing to wear a suit or tux, need help!

Rob M. · #1 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 12:53 PM

Hi my friend is being a real pain and he is refusing to buy a suit jacket to wear just for the cruise for the formal nights because he will never use it again.

I know many of you are thinking yes he will for weddings etc, but he won't. Please just give me an honest answer. We want to do the formal nights but are we allowed to eat in the main dinning room with just a shirt and tie?

I will be wearing a suit but my friend will only be wearing a shirt and tie?

We are sailing on the Carnival Conquest.

Please help!

HappyCruiser383 · #2 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 01:59 PM

I saw a few gentlemen sneak in the dining room with only a shirt and tie. He may be fine. He can also opt not to do formal night at all. I wouldn't worry about it too much.

LisaK · #3 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 02:03 PM

if money is an issue, get him to the Goodwill, Salvation Army or any local thrift/consignment shop and pick-up a sportsjacket real cheap. That way if he insists that he will only wear it once ( ha, once youve cruised your hooked) he will have only spent maybe $10.00???? Hummm???? If that doesn't fly, then yes, he will be ok in a Dress Shirt & Tie, Dress Pants & Dress Shoes.

Rob M. · #4 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 02:46 PM

Thanks for the advice. I still don't understand the whole formal night concept. When I go on vacation I don't want to have to bring a suit along. I go on vacation for just that purpose of escaping wearing a suit everyday to work. The cruiselines really need to relax or do away with such formal nights.

Just my 2 cents.

#5 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 03:06 PM

I think he will be ok on Carnival. One of the formal nights my husband didnt wear his coat, just his shirt tie and dress pants. I seen alot of people like that. Carnival is not as dressy as some of the other cruise lines. Maybe you can find him one on sale, I have seen complete Suits for $99 at JCPenney, Sears etc. May be able to find a good clearence deal.

Rob M. · #6 (**permalink**) January 10th, 2005, 03:44 PM

It's not so much the cost as it is him refusing to wear one. I don't blame him. I like to dress up though so I'll be wearing my black pinstripe suit.

#7 (**permalink**) January 11th, 2005, 11:28 AM

Well, the deal is that formal evenings have long been a cruise tradition - many people enjoying cruising for just this reason as it bring a little touch of elegance to their vacation. If your friend does not wish to be respectful to those who do wish to "follow protocol" on formal nights, the casual buffet and room service are always available.

#8 (**permalink**) January 11th, 2005, 12:40 PM

tell him to stay home.

#9 (**permalink**) January 13th, 2005, 03:57 PM

On a formal night on RCCL there were people at the next table in shorts & T-shirts.

Rob M. · #10 (**permalink**) January 13th, 2005, 05:54 PM

We went and bought him a suit last night. Now I just gotta get him somewhat dressed up for the other nights. He doesn't have much resort wear.

LisaK · #11 (**permalink**) January 14th, 2005, 10:50 AM

Way to go Rob!! on Carnival all he will need for the other nights are a couple of pairs of Dockers type pants some polo shirts, maybe a hawaiian print shirt for Island Party nights, and a nice pair of casual shoes. I do belive that Carnival has relaxed the dress code somewhat to allow jeans in the dining room during dinner on casual nights -i would call just to be sure.
You asked why formal nights? Its a long-standing tradition that goes waay back into the early days of cruising. Its just one more thing that separates, and makes a cruise vacation special from any land-based resort vacation.

Lisa P · #12 (**permalink**) January 27th, 2005, 03:41 PM

If men are only in shirts and ties, sans pants <lol>, count me in for formal nights....

:--)

judiekaren · #13 (**permalink**) February 19th, 2005, 11:01 AM

Lisa P

That's why I can't help but grin when I see the "Shirt and Shoes Required" sign at the entrance to a store. (My warped mind wonders what would happen if someone walked in in just a shirt and shoes?)

Saw a bumper sticker once that said, "Shirt and shoes required. Bras and panties optional."

#14 (**permalink**) February 19th, 2005, 07:38 PM

Rob -

This sounds like my hubby!!!

He refused to wear formal. Period.
Ended up wearing nice slacks and dark blue shirt with buttoned down collar. No tie..

Sorry guys, have to repeat myself.. NOONE CARED.
Everyone was too busy having a good time.

You can't wear shorts or dirty jeans, etc.
Some men will look extremly nice, wearing taxes, etc.

If you absolutly resent wearing formal - don't.

#15 (**permalink**) February 19th, 2005, 07:40 PM

Misspelled TUX again.. :-O

Sorry, Andre!! :-)

#16 (**permalink**) February 19th, 2005, 08:10 PM

Cruise Mates really needs to get spell check. It would really make life easier!

ladycaveat · #17 (**permalink**) February 26th, 2005, 07:17 PM

Most cruise lines will let you rent a tux or suit for formal nights . . . .

#18 (**permalink**) February 26th, 2005, 08:28 PM

No problem. You can wear what you like. T-shirt and slippers are fine. If someone has a proplem with it, it's thier problem, not yours. Really, they can screw themselves for all I care. I've been on, let's say, a few cruises, and always go casual and have yet to have a problem. It's your cruise.

Dorothy · #19 (**permalink**) February 27th, 2005, 08:52 AM

No it's YOUR problem if you get stopped at the door because you are dressed inappropriately. Just because you haven't doesn't mean others haven't. Many of us have seen people in shorts and t-shirts turned away at the door to the dining room.

The cruiselines are pretty clear there IS a dress code. That you have chosen not to follow the code doesn't mean is doesn't exist.

dorothy

#20 (**permalink**) February 27th, 2005, 10:05 AM

We would never wear shorts, jeans or t shirts. My hubby usually wears dress pants and a navy blazer. Not quite a dark suit or tux but I think he looks great. I wear either a dress or black dress pants with a sparkly top. We admit we aren't the best dressed but we certainly aren't sloppy. As for everyone else, you can wear whatever you like. (as long as you are not naked ) If I had time to worry about what strangers wear on vacation, I would have too much time on my hands. IMHO. Happy cruising!

Diverbl · #21 (**permalink**) February 28th, 2005, 12:56 PM

If you want to "do the formal nights" then please, dress formally. Respect the ship's other guests and dress appropriately. A shirt and tie is not "formal".

If you choose to remain in casual attire, then opt for the alternative dining.

Cruise travel has by tradition been one that requires formal attire for dining; the fact is, the casual atmosphere on board on the non-formal nights is a break with tradition.

As they say, when in Rome, do as the Romans. Or else, vacation in Paris.

Diverbl · #22 (**permalink**) February 28th, 2005, 12:58 PM

I just saw where you guys went and bought a suit. That's good. I think he will feel better being dressed appropriately, despite having to wear the suit.

enjoy the trip.

Rob M. · #23 (**permalink**) February 28th, 2005, 10:30 PM

Wow I can't believe this thread is still going. We returned from the Conquest on Jan 23rd. We had a great time and the formal nights were no big deal. I wore a suit jacket and shirt with no tie on one of the formal nights and it was no big deal.

Next cruise planned is the cruise mates cruise on the Island Princess to Hawaii next Jan. We will prob go relaxed formal again for the formal nights.

#24 (**permalink**) March 1st, 2005, 07:38 AM

I think that people who would wear a T-shirt and shorts in the dining room on formal night are just plain rude and looking for attention. It's sad that some people welcome negative attention rather than no attention at all.

There are lots of alternatives without 'rocking the boat', pun intended!