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  #1 (permalink)  
Old February 20th, 2008, 02:43 PM
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Location: MONTREAL
Posts: 1,985
Default need a raise

>
> The Day the Penis asked for a Raise
>
> I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
> I do physical labor.
>
> I work at great depths.
>
> I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
>
> I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
>
> I work in a damp environment.
>
> I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
>
> I work in high temperatures.
>
> My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> P. Niss
>
> The Response:
>
> Dear P. Niss,
>
> After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you
>
> have raised,
>
> The administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
>
> You do not work 8 hours straight.
>
> You fall asleep after brief work periods.
>
> You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
>
> You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting
> other locations.
>
> You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and
> stimulated in order to start working.
>
> You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
>
> You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as
>
> wearing the correct protective clothing.
>
> You will retire well before you are 65.
>
> You are unable to work double shifts.
>
> You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
>
> completed your assigned task.
> And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and
> exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
>
>
> Sincerely,
>
> V. Gina
>
>
>

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old February 20th, 2008, 02:45 PM
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Default

Love it!!!
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  #3 (permalink)  
Old February 20th, 2008, 02:50 PM
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Default

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One part age; three parts liquor!

Freedom of the Seas 2012
Carnival Splendor 2010
Carnival Freedom 2008
Carnival Elation 2007
Celebrity Infinity 2006
Carnival Ecstasy 2005
Carnival Paradise 2004
Star Princess 2002
Viking Serenade 1994
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Old February 20th, 2008, 04:21 PM
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Michael

Cruised more times than I can remember.

Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Courage and perserverance have a magical talisman; before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into the air.

Pick your company wisely! Hang around people who are going to help you become all God created you to be.
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Old February 20th, 2008, 05:03 PM
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Manuel
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Infinity 4/2003
Summit 4/2004+4/2005
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Liberty of the Seas 5/2008+11/2009
Solstice 4/2009
Oasis 4/2010+4/13/2013
Allure 1/16/ 2011
Equinox 4/11/2011
Independence of the Seas 12/29/2013 Top-notch!
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