Go Back   CruiseMates Cruise Community and Forums > People > Cruise Jokes & Trivia - Just For Laughs
Register Forgot Password?

Cruise Jokes & Trivia - Just For Laughs Share cruise trivia or jokes: Registered Users Only

LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old November 28th, 2008, 11:48 AM
dvrdude's Avatar
Senior Member
Cruise Maniac
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 104
Default The Gunslinger

Wild Bill Hickock was minding his own business bellied up to the bar in the Long Branch Saloon when a young gunslinger came through the door and sidled up next to him. Wild Bill ordered up another shot of red-eye and nodded politely at the young man dressed all in black.

“I’m the fastest draw this side of the Rockies” announced the cocky youngster. “Is that a fact?” said Bill. “Even so,” continued the gunslinger “I’ll bet I could still learn a thing or two from a crusty old geezer like your self.”

“I believe I might be able to teach you a thing or two at that, young fella.” said Wild Bill. “It seems to me that you’re wearin’ your pistol belt synched up way to high. Try slacking off on it to where your pistol’s hammer is even with your knuckles.” The young man did as Wild Bill instructed and quick as a flash drew his chrome pistol and shot the derby right off the piano player’s head. The piano player played on as if nothing happened.

“That worked great, old timer. I’ll bet that cut my draw time in half!” said the gunslinger. “What else can you show me?”

“Well,” reflected Bill “I seems to me like it would improve your draw if’n you was to cut a notch in the front of your holster so the gun’s barrel will clear it more quickly.”

Without hesitating the young man whipped out a knife and notched his holster as instructed. Again, no sooner had he finished when he drew with lightening speed, fired and neatly clipped the left side of the piano player’s handle-bar mustache. Again the piano player played on.

“What else have you got old man?” asked the beaming gunslinger. “Go down the street to the wagon maker’s shop and fetch a small keg of grease” instructed Bill. The young man was confused but hadn’t been steered wrong yet, so he complied. When he returned with the grease Bill said “Now get a big hand full of that grease and smear it all over your pistol.” The gunslinger complied reluctantly and re-holstered his greasy weapon.

“How is this going to improve my quick-draw? The dang thing’s so slippery I can barely hang on to it, much less draw it.”

“Well, it won’t” explained Bill “but now when Wyatt Earp over there finishes playing the piano and shoves that Colt up your back side, it won’t hurt so bad.”
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2 (permalink)  
Old November 28th, 2008, 04:34 PM
skymaster's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 10,931

Guess that young "buckaroo" learned a thing or two didn't he?

Marine, Pilot, Singer, Tuba Player, Carnival "Diamond"!
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old November 30th, 2008, 02:07 PM
mehawk's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Houston aka Space City, Texas, USA
Posts: 9,718

Great one!

Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Courage and perserverance have a magical talisman; before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into the air.

Pick your company wisely! Hang around people who are going to help you become all God created you to be.
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old December 3rd, 2008, 07:39 PM
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Palm Coast, Florida
Posts: 24,233


Century 4/1998
Mercury 4/2000+4/2006+7/2007
Sensation 4/2002
Infinity 4/2003
Summit 4/2004+4/2005
Carnival Liberty New Year's Eve 2007
Liberty of the Seas 5/2008+11/2009
Solstice 4/2009
Oasis 4/2010+4/13/2013
Allure 1/16/ 2011
Equinox 4/11/2011+4/4/2016
Independence 12/29/13
Vision OTS 2-14-2015
Freedom OTS 3/6/16
Reply With Quote


bar, equinox, longbranch, pa

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
The Prospector, a Mule and a Gunslinger T C Cruise Jokes & Trivia - Just For Laughs 5 April 16th, 2009 10:20 AM
the OLD Prospector, a Mule, & the YOUNG Gunslinger T C Cruise Jokes & Trivia - Just For Laughs 3 August 1st, 2008 07:17 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:38 PM.
design by: Themes by Design

Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.1