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Old September 6th, 2012, 04:45 PM
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Default A senior moment

A Senior Church Moment



A Preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more.




There is a hush within the congregation.



No one wanted him to leave.

Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the City stands up and Proclaims, .. 'If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!'

The congregation sighs in relief, and applauds...

Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and investor, stands and says, 'If the Preacher will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary, and also estab lish a foundation to guarantee the college education of all his
children!'

More sighs and loud applause.....

Sadie Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, 'If the Preacher stays, .... I will give him sex!'

There is total silence.

The Preacher, blushing, asks her, 'Mrs. Jones, whatever possessed you to say that?'

Sadie's 90 year old husband Jake is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand, and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies, 'Well , I just asked my husband how we could help,
and he said,......'Screw him!'

Isn't senility great ?

Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth...





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Old September 7th, 2012, 07:28 AM
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Gives a new meaning to "ready, willing and able"
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Old September 7th, 2012, 07:36 AM
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I loved it. I laughed out loud.

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Old September 30th, 2012, 02:07 PM
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There you go!
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Cruised more times than I can remember.

Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Courage and perserverance have a magical talisman; before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into the air.

Pick your company wisely! Hang around people who are going to help you become all God created you to be.
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