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  #1 (permalink)  
Old November 16th, 2003, 08:22 PM
LK123
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Default Using baby monitor onboard

We're leaving in less than 2 weeks for a cruise on the Millie...we have a Fisher PRice 900mHz monitor...we've used it at bed n breakfasts & numerous hotels so we could swim in the pool while the baby slept (she is now 20 mos old). It has worked thru 2 floors of major hotels....any chance it would work on a cruise ship?

Our cabin is almost directly below the pool (actually, right below the spa, but near the pool) and we were thinking about bringing it for the same reason...for afternoon naptime, we can go up one level and hang out at the pool while she sleeps.

Anybody tried it before?

Thanks!
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Old November 16th, 2003, 08:27 PM
Kareen
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

I work in child protection services and what you just described is child abuse and your child would taken from you. You shouldn't leave a 20 month old alone.
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Old November 16th, 2003, 09:15 PM
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

OMG I would NOT leave an infant ALONE in a cabin while you enjoy yourself.
Most cruise ships offer babysitting at an additional charge.
Geeze I can't believe you actually do that!
Speaking parent to parent why would you even leave your child alone like that?
Babies are so precious and should never be left alone period!!



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Old November 16th, 2003, 11:32 PM
LK123
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Default Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

I find it hard to believe, actually I know I dont believe, that we are the only people who have gone outside while our baby is sleeping in her crib. Why the HELL would they sell baby monitors? We live in the country, raise horses, and EVERY SINGLE DAY while my toddler sleeps I spend a good 30 -45 minutes in the barn cleaning stalls. If she so much as whimpers, I run back in the house and check on her.

If any of you ever take a shower, talk on the phone on your deck, do gardening, while your child is asleep, you are guilty of the same things we do every day!! How dare someone say I am guilty of child abuse!!!! I dont leave my child at a daycare, I dont even leave her for overnight for any reason, we wanted to take advantage of her daily 2 hour nap and NOT sit in a dark room...

We are never farther than 5 minutes away from her....honey, there are people who are at least that far away when they are in the basement and their child is sleeping on the 2nd floor!

I am shocked and dismayed by people's reaction. So sad to hear people say this...of course I was also shocked to get on this board and find that people blatantly said that children, esp. babies, had no business on a cruise. See, it cramps their style. The only cramp we feel is naptime, and thought since we were near the stairs and moments away from the pool, we could still be within earshot and only a short jog away...closer than I am when I am at home.

Disheartening, that's for sure.
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Old November 16th, 2003, 11:45 PM
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

LK - I think you are forgetting one thing here. You will be leaving your child alone in a stateroom where it is not completely secure. As bad as this sounds, there are staff that can access your stateroom while you are gone! (and not just room stewards!) Would you take the remote chance that someone could take or harm your child while you are up at the pool sunning yourself? If people do not want to watch and care for their children for periods of time while on a cruise - don't cruise until you can leave the child in the children's program or you can afford to pay someone to cruise with you to take the child off your hands for a couple of hours a day. Sorry to sound so nasty, but I am in the health care field and this would constitue child neglect!

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Old November 17th, 2003, 05:12 AM
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Default Re: Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Well I hate to BURST your bubble BUT NO I HAVE NEVER EVER Left my child home alone at that AGE....NEVER!!! My daughter is now 9 and she has never been left alone by herself. I never even went outside of my house while she was sleeping. Yeah, into the kitchen with a baby monitor but NEVER outside the house and never way aways where I could not get there within a few seconds. It will take you minutes to get to your child when in another deck!! What if your child is choking, etc....

And don't forget you are leaving a defenseless INFANT in a cabin where access is available to ALL THE STAFF.....

YOU WOULD NEVER forgive yourself if someone TOOK your child. Or if it was hurt while you selfishly did your "adult" things.

I mean, if you are bringing your child with you on the cruise why the heck do you want to leave it alone? Afterall you say everyone is bashing bringing kids along but you leave your's unattended where it could be hurt!

GOD lady...pay for a babysitter!!! I'm just not understanding how a MOTHER can say these things! ANd if a child cramps you during naptime then leave the baby at home with a responsible adult!!! I would never say that about our daughter! She NEVER EVER cramped my style. GEEZE

Oh and BTW the person who made baby monitors were made for the main reason that they wanted you to be in the NEXT room with your child, not down the street (or rather the deck) or not within a close distance. They were not made to make a parents life easier but to keep the baby safe in ANOTHER room. Not while you leave the child completely alone!!!

If you don't want your child to CRAMP your style then please please leave it with someone who will take care of it!!! Not in a room where strangers can come and go and you can't get there fast enough. Do you think being down one deck you'll be able to get there fast enough if someone takes your child???!!!



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Old November 17th, 2003, 09:53 AM
Luisa
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Here's a good solution that I've used. We get cabins with a verandah -- that way, you can get some sun or sit out there and read a book while the baby naps inside. I leave the curtains open a bit so that I can see the baby or if anyone enters the cabin. Also, I do take a baby monitor with me and use it outside on the deck since it is hard to hear an infant inside if the sliding door is closed -- the ocean can be loud even when many decks above it. That way, I'm not stuck in a dark cabin all afternoon yet I feel confident that I've got a close eye on my sleeping child in case of any emergency.
While leads me to another topic...what if, god forbid, there was a fire on the ship and you couldn't get back to your cabin where you left the baby sleeping? For example, in the ships' youth programs, the counselors have the kids wear wrist bands with their emergency muster station on it so if there's any emergency drills or alarns, they meet parents at the muster station. Getting up or down stairs on a ship during an emergency would not be easy task and you would not be able to get to the baby's room quickly.
In any case, smooth sailing!
Luisa Frey Gaynor
Family Cruise Editor
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Old November 17th, 2003, 09:57 AM
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

woah! let's all calm down here at take a deep breath. Lets educate LK123 instead of attacking her! She said she lives in the country where life is quieter, where everyone probably knows eachother and they look out for eachother. We who live in urban areas or in cities, have to be aware of things. The most logical, and calm answer would be to either hire a sitter while baby is napping or to book a cabin with a balcony, so that you or DH could go out onto the balcony and enjoy the fresh air and sunshine while your baby is napping. As the others have pointed out to you, it really isn't safe for you to leave your baby alone in the cabin at all , for any reason.
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Old November 17th, 2003, 10:18 AM
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Default baby monitor onboard

I am so glad I called social services (child protection svcs to most of you)...unlike the majority of you, she was VERY nice and VERY understanding.

I explained the situation, which she did not see as out & out NEGLECT. She said, as is typical for people in our area, we live in a safer part of the world and can be naive about these things...yes, we are guilty of that. We can send our kids to school without worrying about them making it there!

One nice thing is that she's been cruising before and said the same thing Luisa & LisaK said, just get a cabin with a balcony & hang out there. Her main concern was safety IF someone could take our daughter...which, as I mentioned before, we didnt consider since we dont live in that kind of world out here (I live 30 miles from ANY town of ANY size!!!). Her only other concern was if, by chance, our daughter suddenly grew 4" in a few weeks & could climb out of the pack n play before we could get back there. I explained that we were only going to consider it if it was maybe 100 yards away to the pool. She was not totally uncomfortable with the idea, but thought the balcony would set our minds at ease without making us go crazy in a dark room for a few hours!

She had to laugh, though, when I described the reaction I got from some of you obnoxious women..she indicated that it is those "nosy, bored women like them (you)" that make her job more difficult. She also laughed when I described the woman who said she'd never left her daughter alone in 9 years...we both commented going to the bathroom must be a LOAD of fun!! Since we are new at this cruising with a baby experience, she was very kind and more than willing to give suggestions, without attacking us for being so naive.

I sure am disappointed by the personal attacks I received by many of you. You should be ashamed of yourselves...and find some hobby!!
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Old November 17th, 2003, 10:50 AM
Angel
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Default Re: Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Hello LK123-
I am a mother of five, two of which are foster children. I totally hear what your saying, if I sat outside my childrens room during their nap time I would never get anything done. While my children (24 and 8 month olds) are napping I do take a shower and I do occasionally sit outside on my deck and read my paper or chat on my phone. Most of the time I am running around my house (basement included) and doing chores. I have an alarm in my home and if anyone walks in it will go off (I can still walk around motin sensor off), I have 6 smoke alarms, and I am always with in a ears shot of my children. So as for fire or intruders I'm covered. When it comes to choking there is nothing in or around my children's beds that they can choke on (what good parent knowingly leaves something a child can choke on anywhere in their home let alone in the crib it self).
I understand everyone's points about going swimming and leaving the little one alone in a cruise ship cabin, but as far as the rest of the stuff, PEOPLE CHILL OUT! No parent can ever honestly say you always have your eyes on your kids, every second of everyday. Do you people let your children play around the neighborhood, walk to the bus stop, and when do you shower if you have a little one. For that matter how do you have more than one child for if you were always in arms reach of your baby I'm sure you have no alone time with your husband. Please understand I would not leave my child for two hours without me, so that I could go swimming but I do know where she is coming from. Althought I may not agree with what she is planning on doing I do not believe she deserved the abuse she was recieving. We all leave our children unattended for short periods of time thourghout their life, as our parents did. I use to walk home after school, cook my own dinner, and put myself to bed when I was in the 6th grade. As for the lady with the 9 yr old (I have one of those too!) you need to let your child explorer the world a little on his/her own. Do you sit with them everywhere they go, do you follow behind him when he's riding bikes with his friends, and please tell me you don't sit in the bathromm with him while he showers (because you know god forbid he slips you wouldn't be there to catch him). Our jobs as parents is to prepare our children to survive on their own one day and by sufficating them you are doing them an injustice.
On a professional level, before the babies I was a caseworker and I am currently a foster parent. A parent will not lose their child for doing gardening while their child is sleeping in the house. For that matter even if you walked next door to your neighbors and said Hi for 5 min. No one will remove your child from your custody. Now if you leave your house for 5 hours to go drinking you may have a problem. Just two weeks ago a parent down in NYC ran into a store and left her car running with her 22 month old asleep in it. A gentleman jacked the car and took the kid with him, not only was the child returned to the parents custody immediatly after being found they didn't even press charges on the mother. For I'm sure the mother's moment lack of judgement is punishment enough as she will have to live with what could have happened. Recently while at an amusement park I saw an infant alone in a stroller (parked among the empty strollers) with a moniter. The parents went on the ride and left infant alone, I think this person should have been evaluated, but the police just told them not to do it again. The possibilities of danger in this case was amazing, what will a moniter do if someone kidnapped the kid.
Lk123, I do believe people over reacted but I think if you sit back and think of the possible consequences, that could occur, you will see where they're coming from. While at home I do leave my children unattended during naps so that I may get some chores done, but I know they are as secure as they could be. In your cabin it's dangerous because people could enter and the room is not baby proofed. If you were running down to get a soda from the machine alright but 2 hours at the pool is a bit much.
Final note - children are not helpless creatures. Let them breath a little if you only saw what some of my foster kids have done to survive you'd be floored as well as saddend (and guess what their parents retain custody). A 2 yr old child was left alone for 3 weeks while the mother was in jail and survived. When her dad found her she was naked and dirty with a towel as a blanket watching cartoons. She survived on ketchup and dry pasta, I'm sure it will be hard but her mom will probably get her back if she follows the judges order.
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Old November 17th, 2003, 12:55 PM
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

finally, calmer heads are prevailing. Do i think its a good idea to leave your baby alone while you go to the pool? No. Either hire a sitter for a couple of hours or book a balcony cabin. I am sorry that you were attacked by a few posters. This is really a very good site, full of great information
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Old November 17th, 2003, 05:52 PM
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

--As for the lady with the 9 yr old (I have one of those too!) you need to let your child explorer the world a little on his/her own

HUH? A 20 month old child explore the world on their own? Geeze you can't be serious!
You know there is a BIG difference between allowing a 20 month old to explore the world in a cabin by themselves then leaving alone a 9 yr old child!!! And the OP is the one who said naps cramped her life and her cruise. That is so sad. If you are bringing a baby along then tend to it. Don't leave it alone where God knows what would happen. And my child is 9 yrs old...when she was 20 months old I would never take her on a cruise and leave her ALONE in a cabin while I swam on another deck. Now she does her own thing. When my child was a baby I would plan my swim time around when she was awake. That is just responsible parenting.

--Final note - children are not helpless creatures. Let them breath a little if you only saw what some of my foster kids have done to survive you'd be floored as well as saddend (and guess what their parents retain custody). A 2 yr old child was left alone for 3 weeks while the mother was in jail and survived. When her dad found her she was naked and dirty with a towel as a blanket watching cartoons. She survived on ketchup and dry pasta, I'm sure it will be hard but her mom will probably get her back if she follows the judges order.

As for this CASE it happened where I live. The phone records show someone was in that apartment with that helpless child the whole time. Smells like a setup. And just cause it happens DOES NOT make it right. As a parent you have choices. Just cause a child "could" survive being alone does not make that responsible parenting.



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Old November 17th, 2003, 06:06 PM
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Default Re: baby monitor onboard

--She also laughed when I described the woman who said she'd never left her daughter alone in 9 years

Here if you leave your child alone in your home and leave them there and they are under 11 they can be taken from you! It is called child neglect. And comparing leaving alone a 20 month to a 9 yr old is two totally different things. A baby is a baby and can't fend for themselves. A 9 yr old can fend for themselves but is still a child. When I say I've never left her alone I meant leaving her literally ALONE...duh....like what you are talking about. I don't get in my car, go shopping, etc...and leave her HOME alone. I wouldn't take her on a cruise and leave her alone on a ship with strangers. And sorry to disappoint you but I don't shower or go to the bathroom with her!! Even though you believe that and have a good laugh



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Old November 18th, 2003, 02:18 AM
pg. pg. is offline
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Look , I really hope you won;t' throw the baby out with the bathwater' ( pun, lol) in other words there is some very good advice offered here,don't get so angry that you don't hear the concern. Your child could very easily be sexually molested if left alone, how could you live with that!? What if you and your hubby decided to go in the pool for a moment, even if you only stayed in the water for 4 or 5 minutes that would be all it could take for something horrible to happen, 4 or 5 minutes in the water, and then 3 minutes to run to your cabin, now that's 7 to 8 minutes.Lots of time for your child to choke to death on something the cabin steward forgot to put out of reach. It isn't worth it.
We have 3 kids, and you know what we did, we took turns, I'd nap with the baby, or my hubby would go read a book( our child didn't need it to be pitch black to nap) .

Please , please don't leave your baby alone , people are reacting to your post because they are very fearful for your child, I 've always said:

" It may be a" one" in a million chance, but it ain't going to be my" ONE"

Please enjoy your cruise,may-be put it off for a few months till your child is 24 months and can go in the free sitting, then you and hubby can have some alone time.There are other solutions , and by the way the cabins are small so often the cribs are shoved in very close up against a counter, which may have items your child could grab.Oh, and let me tell you the first time your child climbs out of a crib is coming up, it may surprise you.
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Old November 18th, 2003, 08:30 AM
Angel
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

hkolln-
You re-wrote what I said and you still didn't read it....I said to the lady with the 9 yr old you need to let her explore the world a little....NO WHERE IN THAT SENTANCE DID I SAY THE LADY WITH THE 22 MONTH OLD....you said you've never left your nine year old alone ever....if thats true how does she do her own thing? The fact of the matter is your judging this women and althought you may never have gone swimming while your child was napping, you have left her alone for some duration of her 9 yrs....

I don't care where you're from but you will not lose custody of your child because you left it unattended. As sad as it sounds to terminate a parents rights takes time and money, and no state will waste either because a parent went next door to say Hi to their neighbor. EVERYTHING comes down to money in the world of goverment. If you disagree find a case where a parent LOST CUSTODY for leaving their child alone, and prove it to me...and I mean ONLY because their child was left unattended, not because the parent was intoxicated at the local bar and the child was alone for hours and was found alone in a burning house. You stated that where I'm from its neglect to leave any child under 11 alone (this part is most likely true) and you will lose your child if you do it (you MAY be charged with neglect but you wouldn't lose your child).

Final note if you read and comprehended my original post, you would have known I never suggested the lady leave her child to explore the world at 22 months, and I also stated I would not recommend she leave the child unattended in her cabin. What I did say however is that no parent can ever truly say that they are always in arms reach of their children, and that most of us continue on with our day while our children are napping.......
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Old November 18th, 2003, 01:53 PM
Luisa
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

As I recently wrote in another message board topic about the appropriateness of children being on cruises, I hope we can now move forward to other topics in a more positive fashion. Let's think about all the positives of cruising with kids ,such as quality family time, relaxing beaches, great youth programs, etc. and let's be more tolerant of others' input here on this message board.
Thanks for all your interest in CruiseMates.com and I'm happy to answer your questions about cruising with children.
Smooth sailing,
Luisa Frey Gaynor
Family Cruise Editor
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Old November 18th, 2003, 04:19 PM
christine fischer
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

People are so quick to attack it almost makes me afraid to post on this issue....

Our daughter was 10 mos for her first cruise and I thought about your monitor scenario but assumed our good for nothing monitor wouldn't work. I didn't think about the fact that other people could access the room when I wasn't there and am glad someone pointed it out (although it could have been in a nicer way). I didn't leave her alone. My husband and I would take turns staying with her when she napped. What a drag. We actually fought about who should stay with her. The next time we took her (all every time since then) we got a balcony and have found it the best solution.

Thanks to Luisa for suggesting using a monitor while on the balcony. We have had problems seeing and hearing her from there. It's difficult to see into the dark room from the sunny balcony and impossible to hear over the water and wind noise outside.

If you're lucky, your child might fall asleep in his/her stroller and you could stroller them over to the pool area and take turns sitting next to the stroller in a deck chair while the other person swims. (Our daughter would never do this, it was like her eyes were glued open in any area outside of the room!)

Good luck, have fun, you're not a bad mom and neither is anyone else who responded (although some seem a little high strung...)
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Old November 20th, 2003, 09:32 AM
Luisa
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Christine:
Glad to hear that I was able to give you a helpful hint. Keep cruising with your kids if you can -- it's a great way to travel with your family!
Smooth sailing,
Luisa Frey Gaynor
Family Cruise Editor
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Old November 21st, 2003, 09:02 PM
Kareen
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

LK, you asked a question and got answers. I'm very surprised by the answer that you received from a child protection worker in the town/city of which you live. A 20 month old is too young to live in a cabin while you are on another deck. A lot can happen in a second. I have been cruising since I was 12 years old. I'm now 36. My 11 y/o son has been cruising since he was 14 months old. During his first six years we went on at least two cruises per year. I planned my cruise activities around nap time. When he was old enough I took him to the camp on sea days for a few hours in the morning. I went out on a call where a mother left her 2 y/o and 7 month old alone in the home for a few hours and she was arrested for child abuse/neglect. Just think back to the various fires that have occurred on cruise ships and many passengers were not able to get to their cabin to obtain their life jackets. I hope that you understand the way I responded to your question considering my profession.
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Old November 25th, 2003, 11:09 AM
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Default Re: Re: Using baby monitor onboard

Quote: I'm very surprised by the answer that you received from a child protection worker in the town/city of which you live. A 20 month old is too young to live in a cabin while you are on another deck

Kareen,

LK never said that the child protection worker said it would not be neglect to leave the child alone in a cabin (or that's the way I interpreted it). I believe she was talking about her current situation of leaving the child in the house while she's outside gardening (with a monitor).
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Old November 28th, 2003, 08:52 PM
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Default Re: Using baby monitor onboard

What are you nuts to leave a young one alone in a cabin that age? Anyone could break in etc..just like the other posts have said. Wait till she is old enought to go the children program. Then you can have your alone pool time. Yikes, I just can't it.
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