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  #1 (permalink)  
Old June 30th, 2002, 04:10 PM
TomS
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Default Funny Cruise Disasters!

Does anyone have some (funny) cruise mishap stories where you look back on the whole thing and just laugh? I am not thinking of when the crew carelessly dropped a lifeboat on your head, but rather something fairly minor that could have caused some rather annoying consequences.

I was thinking along the line of what happened to me for my cruise. The morning I was to leave, I couldn't find my money belt. It had copies of my passport, credit cards, and $140 in cash! I looked all over my apartment for it, and I was five minutes from giving up. I found it under my pillow on my bed. I was somewhat flustered, but my mom, who was driving me to the airport, was more annoyed since she had no clue what was going on, and spent 15 minutes waiting for me. A half-dozen Krispy-Kreme donuts quickly improved our moods.
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Old July 1st, 2002, 08:49 AM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Mrs. Bill and I settled in for our first night on Ocean Princesss last Oct31. Seas were a bit choppy ( I actually like this) and the ship was rolling pretty good.
About 2am we wake to the noise of water sloshing about. Mrs. Bill asks me to check it out and I assure her it is nothing but our neighbors using their toilets. WRONG.
A few minutes later I get up and check out the bathroom. With each roll of the ship we are getting a 4 foot geyser out of the shower drain. (thank goodness not the toilet ).
We call for assistance and I toss towels over it to keep it from spreading around the room. A while later a guy shows who you know is not a 'fix-it" guy by his crisp white suit.
He looks in the bathroom and says " yes , you have a problem, I'll send someone".
A while later a very tired looking steward shows up. Fix it? Nope. He mops up the water and leaves. Well Old Faithful was still spouting , so this time I walk down to the pursers desk. The night desk person assures me it will be taken care of. A while later Mr. White Suit shows up again. He'll send someone. This time we get a plumber (with no tools).
He comes , looks and leaves and never comes back. A while later I go downstairs again. I am assured once again it will be taken care of. "Plumber guy" shows again.
He takes a wad of aluminum foil, some wax from a toilet bowl ring and a hammer and
drives a plug into the shower drain. Says he'll come back another time to actually fix it.
Another trip down to my really good friends at the pursers desk. It would all be quite funny if I wasn't quite so tired. They send the poor tired steward again to at least clean up the mess in the bathroom once more. No sleep, no place to shower, we get cleaned up and head for breakfast. We stop by to visit with my good buddies at the pursers desk to let them know we are out of the room. After breakfast we kill some time trying to straighten out seating arrangements with the Maitre D. (another story) . Back to the room and our steward says we are good to go. The port for the day was Princess Cays. Great place to sleep.
Oh yes, we got "compensation" for our disaster. Six chocolate strawberries sent compliments of the nighttime pursers crew.
Don't sweat the small stuff folks. A little lost sleep doesn't ruin a ten day cruise and adds to the funny story you can tell at dinner.
Happy Cruising
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Old July 1st, 2002, 03:53 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

My oddest event had to be the one and only time I cruised without Mrs. Kuki. It was a "business trip" as we were cruising on the Esctasy with Bob Dickinson, and since it was only a 4 day cruise, Mrs. Kuki decided to stay at home.

She did however do her normal packing job for me. She's so organized! Just a terrific packer!
I had a carry on containing my required clothing for my pre night in Miami, and my first day onboard, and then a small suitcase containing my cruise wear. I was set... didn't even have to open the suitcase until I got on the ship to unpack. My only responsibility was to take the key and open my suitcase to unpack.
I got onboard, and when my suitcase was delivered I found I had managed to lose the key.

A half hour after boarding I was calling the Purser's desk... Hi! This is the first stupid person of the cruise calling... Do you have someone who can come pick a lock?

I've since avoided any repeats of that situation by always taking Mrs. Kuki along. At least if it happens again I have someone to blame <G>

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Old July 7th, 2002, 12:12 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

It was a dark and stormy night. The people in the next door cabin must have been having one he!! of a fight as they were slamming drawers.

Unable to sleep because of the noise, I decided to retaliate by slamming a few of my own.

Next morning, leaving the cabin, it just so happened that the next-door neighbors were leaving theirs. Instead of an angry-looking couple who'd been up all night fighting, there were two sweet older ladies with whom I'd played bridge.

One of them looked at me sweetly and said, "I guess you were having the same problems with drawers as we were."

Blushing furiously, I told them that my first stop of the day would be to get a joiner up to repair their drawers AND ours. They thanked me for being willing to take the trouble.

After the next bridge game, I treated them to cocktails and 'fessed up. They got caught in fits of giggles and I giggled along with them.

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Old July 7th, 2002, 05:20 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

That's funny.

Regards,
Thomas
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Old July 13th, 2002, 11:48 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

My dad & mom who are in their 70's were on a cruise last year. My dad is a night owl and likes to stay up late going to the shows, etc. while my mom likes to go to bed early. Dad had been at the late show and returned after Mom had gone to bed. In order to not wake her, he got ready for bed without turning on any lights and he slid into his bed. The next morning he discovered that the chocolate left on his pillow had worked its way into the bed with him and the heat from his body had caused it to melt and smear all over him and the sheets. You can imagine his embarrassment the next morning trying to explain to the sweet little Romanian cabin stewardess that it really was chocolate all over the sheets. After that she always put his chocolate on the bedside table.
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Old July 16th, 2002, 12:55 AM
DeniseToAlaska
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I slept on my chocolate too, but luckily it was just smushed, not smeared.

My mother related her funny (embarrassing) cruise story.

They had their first and only cruise, but the ship was late for some reason. This was about 27 years ago.

So the cruise line had them go have cocktails on another ship while they were waiting. 8 hours later, and a lot of cocktails later, their ship set sail and my mother, not a drinker at that time, got incredibly sick in the bathroom for a long time.

The next day, they had a lunch table with another couple. When my parents asked them how they were enjoying the cruise, they said it was great so far except for the person in the next cabin who had been getting sick all night, keeping them awake!

My mother fessed up but hasn't been on a cruise since. We're fixing that next year.

Denise
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Old July 18th, 2002, 03:06 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

We were in a packed elevator with my 4 year old neice. A woman walked in with gold high heel sandals and orange toe nail polish. My neice spoke up - rather loudly - with "You have the ugliest feet I've ever seen - doesn't she mommy". We could have died.
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Old July 18th, 2002, 03:15 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

This happened last week. It was the night before disembarkation in Vancouver after a wonderful trip on the Sea Princess in Alaska. We were packing our luggage to put outside our cabin. I hung my clothes for the next day in the closet, and my partner hung his shirt on the handle of the cabinet. After the show, I packed up the last of the stuff and put the last bag outside. The next morning, I was already dressed and getting ready to go to breakfast when he asked me "where are my pants?" I said, "aren't they hanging up behind that shirt?" ......"No, they were hanging over the back of that chair" I had packed his pants!!!! He was standing there in a shirt, underwear, and dress socks and NO PANTS! The cruise staff was very nice, getting a big laugh at my expense. They let me off earlier than our "color" so I could find the luggage and get the pants back and hand them off to a member of the staff at the gangway. 10 minutes later he disembarked too. Not letting me forget it for a few days!
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Old July 19th, 2002, 12:04 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I ate too much seafood and got Iodine poisoning. Went to bed at 10 p.m feeling feaverish. Woke up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and my lips were swollen the size of golf balls. I had fun seeing the ship doctor anyways, gave me pills and I was on my way!
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Old July 19th, 2002, 12:07 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Another funny. I came back to my cabin to find my friend laying outside the door, sleeping (must of had one too many Margaritas). I then proceeded to put the "Do not disturb" sign on her ear and took a picture before I' pulled her into the cabin.
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Old July 23rd, 2002, 01:43 AM
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Default Re: Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

This isnt on the cruise, but on the way to the pier. We live in arizona in unbearable heat. While we were driving, the Car broke down on the highway. No air conditioning in 120 degrees is sickening. We called a towtruck and it arrived after us being in blistering heat for half an hour.... ;(

5 hours and two car repair shops later, the repairman told us it was some injector gauge in the gastank and would be 800 to fix and would take days. Besides that, for some reason the car started working fine while the repairman was looking at it, but he said it could break down again at any moment. NO!!! NOT ON MY VACATION!!! We didnt really want to try to drive to San Diego with the car waiting for it to break down at any moment, theres some lonely roads on the way to San Diego, but we bit the bullet and tried, Anything to get to the cruise, right?


Our hearts dropped every time the car chugged, but it didnt break down! A little late, but good we went a day early!
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Old July 23rd, 2002, 01:51 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Yeech. That doesn't sound funny at all !!!

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Old July 25th, 2002, 04:54 PM
ehogan
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I organized all my husband's clothes for our Mexico cruise, put them all together in the closet and forgot to pack them. All he had for the 7 day cruise was what he was wearing and the clothes in his carry-on. He was a very casual dresser for the length of the cruise, and I am never allowed to pack for him again. BONUS!!!!
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Old July 28th, 2002, 12:44 PM
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Default Re: Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I met a lady who said she was cruising Vancouver to Vancouver on the Ocean Princess. I told her the Ocean was going all the way to Seward and then take a bus to Anchorage and then fly home. When she looked at her itinerary I was right. We went and talked to the Ship's rep. who arranged for her to get airline tickets to fly home with her two children. She had to spend one night in Anchorage. Guess what? She had 3 brothers she had not seen in 5 years LIVING IN Anchorage and she spent the night with one of them. Great ending, huh??
IT WAS THEIR FIRST CRUISE:
I bought soda cards for my two teen grandchildren. First port I let them go gift
shopping on their own. When I got back to our cabin they had stocked the frig with cans of sodas they bought in port. They also bought tuna fish Subway sandwiches and brought them back to the cabin to eat for lunch. That day they were serving tuna fish sandwiches in the dinning room.. I said to both of them, "you know, I think it is better if you both come back to the ship and eat lunch at the buffet and then go out again. That way you can save your money to buy gifts. They said,"Okay grandma".
In Skagway, one grandchild said he wanted to buy his godmother an ashtray for a gift. After the ship had left port and we were already cruising he showed me the ashtray he bought for her. I said,"Oh this is a nice ashtray and it is plastic melmac that is fire resistant. It is very nice". I didn't tell him it should have had the name of Skagway on it.. I just love my two innocent sheltered teen grandchildren. They came home real happy. I promised to take them on another cruise during Spring Break.
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Old August 17th, 2002, 08:35 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

This is my parents funny cruise story. My parents went on a cruise to Bermuda with a large group. Similiar to Rick's disaster but different ending. Guy's wife packed his pants to wear to disembarkation up. In the am he had nothing to wear but tee shirt and shoes. Instead of calling the steward, he took his wife's carry on floral bag and cut some leg holes in bottom(with nail scissors) and made them into shorts. He then proceeded to breakfast and waiting to disembark. The staff took pictures and everyone kind of did a double take and laughed until they cried. My mom has a picture and it is undescribable. hilarious..guy hasn't cruised since!
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Old November 23rd, 2002, 12:03 AM
Sooshie
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

We sailed the Monarch in Oct. 02. We boarded the ship, ate lunch and went right to the pool to get some sun. My husband went to the mens room at the pool but didn't tell me where he was going. He was gone for at least 20 minutes so I thought he just went exploring on the ship while I enjoyed the sun. When he returned he said he had gotten locked in the mens room. He was banging on the door and looking out the small window waiting for someone to let him out. With the steel band playing at the pool it became rather hard for anyone to hear the banging coming from the mens room. Finally after over 10 minutes of banging a crew member let him out. He explained the problem to the crew member but he just shrugged his shoulders and left. Two days later we saw that the mens room was taped off with caution tape..If you too had this happen to you, you now know you are not alone. My husband had a huge bruise on his hand from banging on the door. This sounds funny now, but at the time he was not laughing.
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Old January 14th, 2003, 11:00 AM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Twenty years ago I sailed on the Pacific Princess. At this time all the dining room staff were Italian. My sister and I were seated at a dining table with all attractive women, and unbeknowst to anyone one of the
women was born in Italy, so of course she was fluent in the Italian language. The last day of the cruise she really let the waiters have it, in Italian of course. Come to find out the waiters had names for all the women and went into detail (according to this woman) about what they (would like) to do to each of us. You can imagine the look on their faces when they learned this woman understood everything they said all week! Waiters BEWARE!
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Old February 5th, 2003, 10:28 AM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

This is not a disaster, but it was very funny!
We were on a ship that had the gym and the hairdressers in the bowels of the ship somewhere. I went to get my hair done, while dear husband went to use the gym. When I was finished, he said that I had to see what was going on in the gym's aerobics room. I went in and there was a woman with her video camera, filming the shore excursions that were playing on the tv in there. She would stop when titles came up and films were changed. We decided that she was filming them all as her "vacation video"..........why?? Who knows?
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Old February 17th, 2003, 12:28 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

This was funnier to the passengers than to the gift shop girl. We were on a repositioning cruise (along the eastern coast) and this young lady "missed the boat". In a few minutes an outboard came in sight. That poor girl tried to board the ship over and over but water was too choppy. When we got to the next port, there she was (she had flown there). When she walked up to the gift shop, the windows were totally plastered with photos of her rather unladylike attempts to get on board.
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Old February 17th, 2003, 03:37 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

In 1989, with just a few cruises under out belt and before we really knew what cruise line and what kind of ship we liked, my husband and I booked a Carnival cruise through the Panama Canal. It was the Tropicale. Several unfortunate things happened on this ship, so much so, that I wrote a letter and they gave me a 10% discount on any future cruise I might want to take; and I didn't take them up on it until a year ago New Years Eve (but alas I'm getting off the subject). On the Tropicale (which everyone was later calling the Titanic) we had a inside cabin that was directly behind the laundry room. One morning I was awakened early with a loud, loud banging on the wall where we were sleeping. I got out of bed, went around the corner and looked in a laundry room where some lady was banging against the wall trying to get soap out of a dispenser. When she saw me she said, you'll have to wait all the machines are busy. I said to her, I'm trying to sleep and you're hitting the wall where my cabin is ......from then on, I look to see where our cabin is located. Also, after trying Carnival many years later, I've decided that I still don't like them as a cruise line and I'll probably never book another cruise on them. We did about 5 and out of the 5 with Carnival, two were really bad and the other three were just average......It was on the Tropicale that we missed a port because the anchor was stuck in the mud and it took a while to get unstuck.......also on that cruise, it was the only one out of 27 that I've ever gotten the flu on and that was because someone had brought it aboard, they just didn't call it the Norwalk Virus back then.......
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Old March 2nd, 2003, 08:36 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I guess this happens to many people, but my husband was obviously not a gambler, and he and my son, 22, were playing the slots. Well my husband was very upset, cause he thought he had broken the machine, whereas my son said "Dad, I think you won big". He had won $800.
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Old March 3rd, 2003, 01:27 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Packed all my luggage, locked them up tight and when we got on board realized we had left the keys home.
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Old March 3rd, 2003, 10:47 PM
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Default Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Poor guy. However, you mentioned a steel band. Do you remember the name? If you do. Thanks
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Old March 5th, 2003, 04:34 PM
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Default Re: Re: Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I don't recall the name, but I think I have one of the Compass papers that may have the name in it. I'll let you know
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Old March 10th, 2003, 10:28 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

I forgot to pack my husbands black dress socks to match his suit for formal night. He borrowed my daughters little girl socks ( they were black) for the first formal night. On the way back to the cabin we decided to stroll through the shops on board and I found men's black dress socks on clearance for a dollar a pair. I never thought to check the shop before hand. It took us a few minutes to pry my daughters socks off of his feet. That item is now the first item on our packing list.
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Old March 11th, 2003, 05:35 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

After cruising 8 times we of course have great storys to tell about every one of our cruises. So here goes with breif storys on the most memorable ones some funny some sad but like I sad these are where the memorys lie.

On our first cruise in 91 we were on the Fantasy. We hit a large storm the first night out. One unfortunate woman got her leg caught in one of the upper dores just as the ship roled, ending up breaking her leg. We were only a few miles from Miami and the ship did a meadvac. The coast guard came and lifted her off but the Nordic Empress that was tandoming with us had to be brought with in 20ft of us. So that if in the storm, the chopper crashed on our decks we could be evacuated to the Nordic. All of this occured as we slept in our cabin only to learn of it the next morning in Freeport.

In 99 we were on the inagural of the Triumph out of NY. The ship was clearly not ready for passangers. After checking into our stateroom we took the atrium elevators up to the top deck. On the way up we saw crew men on scafolding in the atrium still instaling the tiles of the mosaic. When my sister whent to the childerns pool they told us to check back at the end of the cruise for it had not been built yet. Finnaly towards the end of the cruise the main pool began to leak. Several inside cabins below it became flooded and one elderly woman called the pursers office saying that the ship was sinking. "I know thats an urban legend of cruise storys but I promis it happend." The leak was infact so bad that they had to close sections of the blouvard and the casino because of water dammage.

A year later on one of the inagurals of the Ocean Princess. "One would think we had learned out lesson about inagurals." We lost a peice of luggage that contained all our shoes. Dad and I had packed our dress shoes in our luggage. So that left Mom and my sister with there white tennis shoes for the formal night. One can only imagin the two of them all dressed up but with strikeing white tennis shoes. That cruise does remain to this day our best ever.

Then in 2001 we had booked one of the first wester caribbean cruises of the Grand Princess. Weeks before we got the notice like everone else; that another ship had hit the pier in Costa Maya and the ship would not be docking there. No problem.... Then a week before the cruise we leard that we had been up graded to a Vista Suite. No problem.... So the day finnaly arrived. We got up early flew to Atlanta and then on to Miami. Upon arriving in Miami the plane pulled up to the gang way and hit it. We honistly felt the plane jerk as we struck it. It dented in a large section of first class. Being that the plane was a 767 "I think" the piolt announced that in a few moments they would have the gang way lined up with the exit just front of the wing. The stewards were obviously not familiar with this door and as they opened it the emergancy slide deployed. So again the captin came over the intercom and told us to wait and that the gang way would be moved back to the front of the air craft. So an hour after ariveing in Miami we were off the plane. No problem..... We found the Princess rep and were escoreted to the waiting area. The buss arrived and we boared and we were off to Port Everglades. Just as we turned off I 95 the buss decided that it was tired and refused to work any more. It just stoped running. So there we sat with in sight of the Grand. The buss driver spent a good 30 min in the back of the buss trying to fix it but nothing happend. Finaly he decided to call for help. Only then after help was on the way did the buss start. The driver tryed one more time and the buss stared up and the cut off just as we pulled up to the door of the pricess cruises building. So we were there and ready to begin to cruise No Problem.... With in 20 min we were up the esclators and ready to board. Just as we approached the I-Pass system, it shut down. So there we were standing less than 10 feet from the Grand and we were halted again. The Princess reps told us Its No Problem............ we'll have it up and running with in 5 min. 30 min later we finnaly walked into our suite. Other than the frist day Problems the cruise was wonderful.

As I said we've had a lot of fun times and these are mearly the misshaps of our cruising exepreiencs. Aslo please excuse my spelling and grammer errors the key board I'm using is crappy and well.. I cant spell! I hope you enjoyed and have a great day!

Bonvoyage



Carnival Spirit in 2 weeks!
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Old March 15th, 2003, 12:59 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Croozman I did enjoy your story spelling and all,
On the Radiance in Jan. I went to the late show , I had been on a long shore trip and must have been more tired the I realized, because the next thing somebody tapped me on the shoulder and said <Lady you can go home now, the show is over> I do not remember a single thing about that show, must have slept pretty good. PS I hope I did not snore Auguste
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Old April 17th, 2003, 08:16 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

My boss and his wife on a HAL cruise last year were sitting out on the pool deck and all of a sudden fine black stuff starting raining on everyone, some people thought it was actually rain it was so fine, no it was some kind of oil from the stacks, HAl offered all on that deck free cleaning for swimsuits etc. Went back to their verandah room, went out on the balcony and the sliding glass doors shut and they could not open them, they were stuck on the verandah, they started yelling to other folks on their verandahs but the others could not hear them. Finally an old couple called the front desk and tried to describe the cabin they were in and someone came and got the door opened, but my boss happened to be in his underwear on the verandah. Needless to say HAL offered them a 50% off their next cruise which they just took last month
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Old April 21st, 2003, 02:01 PM
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Default Re: Funny Cruise Disasters!

Hello

What happened not so much as on the ship, but more at a port-of-call (Cozumel).
And it happend to my friend, I was also on her ship, and she was on Honeymoon!

Little back story was: My friend and I went shopping picked up a mug, it said $55.00, I asked how much in US dollars, and was told 5.50, so that makes it 10% exchange rate...okay!

My friend calls me up on the ship tells me she thinks she was ripped off in COZ, I asked her to tell me about what happened, she said she was trying to buy something worth 19.95, and when she tried to use her charge card, it was pre-authorizing it as 205.00-208.00 and she mad, and having a fit, and her new hubby was "over it", and walked out of the store, and she kept telling the lady to explain what she was doing charging that much on her charge card, and it seems this went on for 30 mins, and the charge was run-voided-run about 6 times, finally the store-keeper told my friend she was NOT selling her anything, for her to get out, and my friend wanted to know, from me, what was going on. (I am also her TA, and sold her the trip). I explained to her, that the lady WAS right, she was running the card on a mexican issued bank-credit card machine, but that my friends bank would pay it in US dollars, and that the lady was not over charging her, and that something got lost in the translation between her and the shopkeeper.

So the morial of this story is, make sure you watch your change slips, and remember WHERE you are, and that the country will run the charges from THIER banks, but only collect in US dollars.

Darrell
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