Last night our heroic Navy SEALS assisted Osama Bin Laden in reaching the Gates of Paradise.
As soon as he entered, the first person he met was George Washington. Washington was carrying a big club and proceeded to beat the crap out of Bin Laden.
As he struggled up from the ground, he found himself standing in front of Thomas Jefferson, who had a big club and beat some more crap out of Bin Laden.
Barely able to stand up, Bin Laden next met John Hancock, carrying a big club. Behind Hancock he could see a long line of people waiting their turn.
He whined, "This is not what I was promised in Paradise!"
Hancock said, "I think maybe you misunderstood. These are your 70 Virginians!"