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Old August 8th, 2005, 08:24 AM
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Default SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Like everyone else. I am sad to hear the news of Peter Jennings passing. It went to fast and he was so young. I remember when Sept 11th happened, and we were all so upset. I felt an odd sense of comfort when he finally came on the air and covered the story. I stayed with him, threw the whole thing.

But what I really want to post about is smoking. I used to smoke and quit when I decided to have children some 18 years ago now. It was the hardest thing I ever did. My husband, has not been able to quit. He tried so many times. But just can't. I understand because I have been through it, but at the same time feel as if he is playing russian roulette with our lives too. Todays news about Peter makes me realize how much I need to make him quit. Keep trying at least. But I know nobody can make anyone quit. So what do I do? Sit back till he has a medical scare? I am really upset you guys, and need to know how I can help/get him to try, and keep trying till it's done. Please advise me!!!

My prayers go to Peters family as they struggle with understanding this needless death and the loss of a great man.

TBug

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Old August 8th, 2005, 09:11 AM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

TBug, I am glad you quit, I did too. But have developed asthma, which Dr feels is smoking contributed. Ellis smokes and always will, no matter what, he does smoke outside now, no smoking in the house because of me. I don't know your situation but Ellis has a lot of health problems and pain, so the smoking helps him, I can relate to how he feels because even today I long for a smoke!! Crazy but true. I put it in God's hands and pray for the best. Waht will be will be. Wish I had better words to say, but this is the way I have handled it.

Jeanne Good Luck!
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Old August 8th, 2005, 09:57 AM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

There are many programs sponsored by health care facilities all over the country (don't know where you live). When I quit in 1984, I lived in Connecticut and participated in a smoke enders program sponsored by one of our largest hospitals. They had a very good program (meetings at the hospital at night) with tons of reading material and a great support group. I quit cold turkey and the first three days of withdrawal were so horrible, I never wanted to go thru that again. However, my husband continued to smoke, there was nothing I could say or do to convince him to stop and he was eventually diagnosed with smoking related cancer and died at 42. I pray that your husband will find the inner strength, perseverence and REASON for quitting.
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Old August 8th, 2005, 10:20 AM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

There are clinical trials going on using the anti-smoking patches IN CONJUNCTION with the gum. The results are very promising so far, I understand. This might be worth talking to your doctor about and it might be worth seeing a clinical psychologist with your husband to talk through this issue using professional guidance. Perhaps a third party would help to clarify the issues at hand in a less threatening way.

Just a thought!
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Old August 8th, 2005, 10:20 AM
DENISE H
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my dad get cancer from smoking i couldn' belive how fast he went my sister and her
family smoke i wish they did't but what can i say i personal don't smoke the smell
of smoke makes me sick
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Old August 8th, 2005, 10:29 AM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Rosetattoo, THAT is my worst nightmare. Just feeling like now, I have to do something, but what? I love this man so much. I can't just wait for it to happen.

I can't imagine what you must have been through. Thank you for posting.

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Old August 8th, 2005, 11:08 AM
LindaT
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Default Re: Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I quit using "smoke away". It's great. You keep smoking while you are using it but after a few days you just don't want a cigarette anymore. For me I didn't panic because I could have one if I wanted. Maybe that will help?
I know I tried the patch and it gave me nightmares, then I tried the gum and got addicted to it. With Smoke Away I just quit.
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Old August 8th, 2005, 11:18 AM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I used to be a heavy smoker but was able to quit smoking almost 30 years ago while participating in a Smoke Enders program. I had previously tried other programs (my mother, also a heavy smoker, had lung cancer), but I could not quit by going "cold turkey" and nothing else worked. Smoke Enders uses behavior modification to help you stop. You have a goal "Quit Date" and ease off smoking gradually. By the time that date comes, you can't wait to quit. Anyway, I am so happy that this program worked for me (don't know if it is still in existence) because I have NEVER CRAVED a cigarette since. The secret really is this: You have to really WANT to stop smoking!
Cindy

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Old August 8th, 2005, 12:32 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

You can't make someone quit... or even WANT to quit. Just like most self-help or improvement programs the person has to want to do it himself. I would suggest that you talk about your fears, your love, your dreams, etc. Keep it about YOU and how his smoking effects YOU. "When you smoke I feel...." is a great place to start. Offer to help him in every way possible IF he decides to quit. Ultimately, it's up to him, though... and there's really nothing you can do to make him quit. Good luck.
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Old August 8th, 2005, 02:47 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I think he will have to have the will to quit for anything to be successful. Good Luck, pray, and I hope the best for you. Both my parents died of different cancers, both smokers, and it is a terrible thing for any family. My husband,I and our 2 girls don't smoke and I thank the Lord everyday we don't. My husband quit 25 yrs. ago and it is hard and 4 years ago I lost 42# and that was tough, but we were successful because we had the desire to do it. I think that is where you have to begin with the determination and the will to do it. Good Luck.
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Old August 8th, 2005, 03:02 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I wish there was a permanent way for people to stop smoking. I have never smoked. Keith did but stopped more than 30 years ago. Even so, he was diagnosed with emphysema about a year ago. Emphysema is caused by smoking. He now uses two inhalers along with his other medical problems.

I think about the only thing you can do is talk to your doctor. The suggestion of the clinical psychologist is an excellent idea, as well. Maybe your doctor could refer Ellis to someone who specpializes in smoking addiction.

Judy
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Old August 8th, 2005, 03:04 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I never smoked so no problem there - but I want to commend all of you who have managed to quit - WTG. It must be so hard to do. Maybe the publicity surrounding the death of Peter Jennings will actually be the inspiration others need to quit - I hope so.

ttfn Jennifer
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Old August 8th, 2005, 03:27 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I too was a heavy smoker, and knew that I needed to quit, for my family, and for myself. One day about 30 years ago, after smoking in the car all day long, and having a terrific headache from all the smoke, I decided it was time. I threw the remaining cigarettes in the trash, and haven't had one since. Was it tough??? YOU BET IT WAS, but was it worth it???? I probably wouldn't be here today ,had I continued smoking. In any case, you can't quit until you really want to. With Gods help, you'll be able to quit.
See you aboard,
Ken
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Old August 8th, 2005, 05:04 PM
Don Smith
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I had a five pack a day habit. Smoked 35 years and quit cold turkey. Nearly 340 days without, and $3400 richer. Ask how I paid for my cruise. A person stops smoking when he or she finds the reason to stop that works for them. Bugging some one about stopping may make them smoke more, but I do not think it will make them stop.
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Old August 8th, 2005, 05:45 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Was Peter Jennings a smoker? I don't remember. I thought that he might have gotten it from second hand smoke which is just as scary.
My former, now deceased, mother in law was a heavy smoker and finally had to quit because of chronic bronchitis. Her son, my ex, was a heavy Lucky Strike smoker and he quit back in the mid-70's but proceeded to put on 15 pounds. He couldn't stand to be around smoke after he quit.
My current husband is not a regular smoker but will partake if in a situation surrounded by smokers, like at the bowling alley, etc. His mother was a smoker but used a patch to quit. I banned smoking in our house, but leave it to her to walk in and use a candy dish as her ashtray!! My step-son smokes, and our former son-in-law smokes, and it's hard to be in the same room-they had to go in our screen room when they visited to actually smoke-but their clothes smelled of smoke.
I tried it in college but never continued-especially when it came to buying my own cigarettes. Every one that I smoked was offered. That was in the mid-60's.

I have watched Peter Jennings on TV most of my life. I had already missed him when he left the air. Now, there's no hope of his return.
Lynne

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Old August 8th, 2005, 06:12 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I have never smoked, and can remember as a child, hating the smell and the smoke generated by my parents' smoking. My dad died of lung cancer 22 years ago, yet my mother and my sister never quit after watching him suffer for a year. As most of you know, my mom died this year of the same disease, lung cancer, with emphysema thrown in. In adulthood, I've developed asthma from 2nd hand smoke.
When I met James, he was a smoker, who tried not to smoke in my presence, but I told him, I could never live with a smoker. He did not want to quit, and nothing I said could make him. Until he had a health scare - an extremely sore, burning throat that was so bad, it hurt to smoke, so he quit cold turkey. He became dependant on toothpicks (his cigarette substitute!) for awhile, but has never gone back to smoking. Hopefully, I'll have him around a few years (alot of years!) longer!

donna

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Old August 8th, 2005, 06:20 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

TBug, 'He' has to really want to quit first and foremost. It is a terribly hard thing to do, I know. After being confined to the hospitial for 6 months you would thinnk I was cured but the very first thing I did was stop on the way homne to buy cigarettes! I finally was able to quit about 17 yrs ago and used Cigararrest to stop. There are times I still would like to smoke but I know I will never do it again. Best of luck to him and please support him as you have no iddea just how hard it is after you have been somoking fo so many years.
Jim

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Old August 8th, 2005, 07:15 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

I'll add my story to this post. I had health issues as a child, always sick, in and out of the hospital, treated for pleurisy at 8 and 9. My mom had me when she was 40, she was a very heavy smoker. She finally quit in her 60's and amazing that she lived to 80, but she had major breathing issues, took steroids, visted an allergist every week.

I didn't make the connection until years later that my childhood issues were probably due to my mom being a heavy smoker (not stopping while she was pregnant) and my dad also smoked. I have to be very careful and cannot let any cold/sinus issue go or I get pneumonia.

I used to be so sick in my 20's, didn't get a handle on it until I was in my 30's. I stopped going to smokey bars, stopped playing bingo, stopped bowling and my health did a complete turn around. My doctor told me with your history, you can't be around smoke like other people. He said I don't have the tolerance and no sense in asking for trouble.

My parents did not die from cancer, my mom went very fast from heart failure and my dad after he fell and broke his leg. I consider both of them lucky that they didn't suffer from cancer.

If you're still with me, a man I worked with, whom I greatly admired, died recently from throat and lung cancer. He had several surgeries and spent the last year of his life on a machine for nourishment. The last 3 years were very hard on his family. I can still see Charlie and his pack of Camels, always smoking.

I never smoked, my sisters either, but we all have health issues, I believe 2nd hand smoke is a very real threat - period.

Susie
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Old August 8th, 2005, 07:50 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Thanks you all so much for your posts.

I take all of you advise very seriously. I don't post something like this and not care very much for all you say. I have read every post!

Some posted some products I have never heard of. You can bet, I will check them all out. Like smoke away. The one where you can smoke and use the product. That sounds interesting. Never heard of it. What is it?

Others posted trying combined products. Great idea. One thing I found interesting is every poster was a quiter. Sharing thier personal stories. I was touched. But wonder what some current smokers feel about the process of quitting. Whats it going to take for them? Or maybe that just don't plan on ever quitting.

I just think you just can quit quitting.

I have told him a million times how much I am worried about his health. Even our kids have. My daughter has even cried when someone we knew died of cancer due to smoking, because she thinks that is how he is going to die. Even, that didn't help. He quits for awhile, but goes back.

Smoking is the single most difficult addiction to break. It is harder now than when I quit. I understand that but I don't want to be a nag either.

I'll keep trying. Quietly. Gently. With love. Till I find something. I just can't do nothing.

Thanks again to all of you. I'll still be watching incase some smokers post. I appreciate their honest posts as well.

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Old August 9th, 2005, 01:19 AM
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Default Re: Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

One of the posters ask if Peter Jennings was a smoker.
He had given it up some years ago, but started smoking again after 9/11. I heard this on the Larry King show tonight. They were paying a tribute to Peter Jennings, and Larry's guests were Dan Rather, Barbara Walters and Tom Brokaw.
I recently found out that my husband started again 3 month ago, after giving it up last September. I caught him red handed, and I was so disappointed, as he was coming up on a year. I understand how difficult it is, as I smoked heavily for a long time, but quit almost 9 years ago. I had developed asthma and had no choice. I was tempted to start again after I felt better, but then remembered how extremely difficult it was to quit. My asthma got worse and the doctor finally realized that it was medication induced,. When he changed my prescription I felt better, but will still get an attack here or there, when I have a bad cold.
I was on 40mg of Corgard for a rapid heartbeat, which caused my asthma, the doctor said.
I don't plan on going back to smoking, because I don't want to be an "outcast" again.
Ginnie
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Old August 9th, 2005, 07:11 AM
Lynne and Trevor
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Ginnie
Thanks for the update. I missed the first part of the Larry King Show last night when that might have been mentioned about Peter's smoking. I read it in the paper this AM. It truly is too bad.
I am thankful that neither of my sons smoke. Lynne
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Old August 9th, 2005, 08:42 AM
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Default Re: Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Peter Jenning's death is a real shame. He had quit smoking 20 some odd years ago but, as stated above, had gone back to the "evil weed". While smoking is a huge factor in lung cancer cases it is by no means soley responsible for the growing lung cancer rate. For most people smoking is the MOST addictive substance they will encounter. It gets a grip on you and never lets go. As some have said, I thought Smoke Enders was a wonderful way to stop. Are they still around?
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Old August 9th, 2005, 01:41 PM
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Default Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

When I worked for the airline an elderly lady came off a flight and the first thing she asked was where is the nearest bar? I need a cigarette and a drink! She told me she was so excited because she was going to turn 100 yrs. of age in a few days. The last time I went out on the gambling boat the man next to me at the blackjack table was 93 yrs. old and chain smoking.

Always wondered why some people who never smoke get lung cancer, and others smoke and live well into their 90's and beyond!
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Old August 9th, 2005, 02:41 PM
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Default Re: Re: SMOKING and Peter Jennings-Need advise!

Carol, you have a point. I wonder what exactly determines who gets it. I just read that Christopher Reeves' wife has lung cancer, she was just recently diagnosed, and she does not smoke.
I hope Peter Jennings did not die in vain, I hope that his death causes some people to quit. I myself am a smoker, I have quit numerous times, the longest I have ever gone was four months. In fact I was on the Century cruising when I decided to stop. But it was not to be, it is a major addiction.

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