I don't want to get in an argument with a bunch of moms...I just meant that you can't control what your kids do when they aren't with you, so why make rules you can't enforce? And the curfew thing really varies from family to family- just keep in mind that the teen club is open (and under supervision) until 2ish.
I'm 16 and my rules have pretty much eben 2:00 Am curfew. and make sure I check in for dinner and do atleast one thing a day with someone of my family. I usually did it with my mom. But also I usually ended up seeing my family on the cruise somewhere. As with teh curfew thign i rarely stayed up past 12:30 unless I was doing a teen activity. I could stay up later but I never opted too. Also I was sharing the room with my older brother and he went to bed earlier than I did, and I felt rude coming in so late. so I came in earlier.
As in the checking in thing every hour, as a teen its really hard to remember, especially if you are having alot of fun. And if you can't find your parents its hard as well. So I think parents need to leave it up to us to check in as long as you estbalish that we ahve to do it at least three times one in the morning once in the afternoon, and one at night.
Well those are my opinions coming from a teenager.
tyhanks for reading,
Recently sailed on the Conquest with my 2 boys, ages 15 and 17. First time in separate rooms (they were right next door). They had a 1am curfew; had to call our room when they got in or knock on our door to let us know (the purser's desk would not issue us an extra key so I couldn't check on their room..........). They also came to every dinner (they enjoy the dining room food so no big deal for them), and, of course, we went on shore excursions as a family. On the last night, the 17 year old had a later curfew because most of the older teens were going to stay up while the Conquest sailed up the river. We saw him around 2am, just hanging out in the deck chairs with his friends. They turned in around 3am. My younger son turned in around midnight because, unfortunately, some of the younger teens got drunk and the teen club dance was closed down early because of them. I was worried because I couldn't find him (and we couldn't get in his room---no extra key, remember). Turns out he was asleep in his room! (he has a hearing loss and didn't hear us pounding on the door, at first!).
ima 15yr old and my parents are really strict so im used to it but 3AM im sorry thats just up too late personally what are u gonna be doing the hole point of the ship is to enjoy it how are you going to enjoy it if your waking up at 1PM
my parents havent set a curfew but im lucky if i get 1AM i am resposible and they no that and i would be happy with 1AM for those who complain what are you gonna miss out on huh? i definitly agree with not going into another sexes cabin if your going into to go chill with girls (if u area girl) then i dont see a problem just be smart (if your gonna get in trouble if and when ur parents find out THEN DONT DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!)
my parents expect me to check in and go to dinner thats no problem it doesnt bother me
I dont want to come across rude, but some of these parents who think they are going to get their 15+ teens to go "hang out" in their cabins at 11pm are in for a real big problem once onboard!
On RCCL the teen club dosent even start until 11:15! Being on a ship is completly different then staying out on land. If you trust your kid, reward them with some freedom on their cruise. My parents (who are considered the strictest among my friends) ask me to meet them somewhere around 12:30 and then we usually meet in the room at 2-2:30. They know I wont do anything stupid or - (a. they would never take me on a cruise or (b. I would have to spend the whole trip with them!
I am not saying let your kids roam around the ship until 5AM, but give them some sort of freedom, I go to sleep at 11 on school nights at home!
All in all, if your kid is responsible, you shouldent have too much to worry about!
Dan, I agree. On the Conquest, there were activities until at least 12:30 or 1am for the older teens. My kids are very responsible, but I am still very strict and a worrier. On our cruise, they were given much more freedom than at home because of the activities on the ship. Of course, if a family has a early shore excursion the next morning, an earlier curfew is reasonable. By the way, my kids didn't want to miss out on any daytime activities either (including the breakfast buffet) and were up and out of their cabin before us!
Im not going to lie, some of these parents sound a little insane. I'm 17 and I have been on a cruise when I was 14, 16 and now im going on one when i turn 18 (all of which were with my family). I have no rules besides eat dinner with the family and go on excursions that we planned before the vacation already started. I think that having your teens check up every couple hours on a walkie-talkie is just a little much. I know, all I did on a cruise was hang out with some people I met, went swimming, hot tubs, and ate . I don't think you have anything to worry about unless you have a irresponsible teen. I didn't have a bed time either, but I dont have one at home, this allows me to be responsible on when I should get to bed, so that I get enough hours of sleep. Basically, it all depends on how much you trust your teen.
Last year we sailed the Diamond Princess with a 12 year old daughter...she had to have breakfast with us..check in every couple of hours with walkie talkie...be in the room by four to get ready for dinner...eat dinner with us..change and hang with friends until 10-11 depending on when my husband would go find her and see what she was doing and who she was with...In case things changed..we met her friends etc..before...then they went to bed..and I played in the Casino until 2...She went on the excursions with us except of Cabo...Hubby and I left her with a group of her friends..and we met two couples and toured the sights in Cabo...not much for kids there...We all had a good time and were happy..This year on the Sapphire...she can hang out in the teen area and disco..still the same curfew...You have to go back home again...two much rope and a kid will hang for sure...cheers
After our latest cruise a few weeks ago, I tend to agree with you somewhat, Annisherm.
My 15 yo son had a 1 am curfew, which we stretched until 2 am if there was something going on he wanted to attend. Teen events run late and anything earlier than 1 am means they can't attend the events with the other teens.
We ate dinner with our teen (although not every night), went on all shore excursions with him, but other than that let him have his independence. It worked out well for all of us because he had to check in every 3 or 4 hours. His check-in time, frankly, was the time I knew I wanted to be in bed - so anything past 2 am wouldn't work for me!
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Thanks Annisherm for giving a teen's perspective -- very valuable to hear. I have a pre-teen and saw the difference this year in respect to all that you posters have discussed. Yes, it's a good place to give teens freedom but I agree with a lot of you that they should have to go on shore excursions with you for some shared family time.
Luisa Frey Gaynor
Family Cruise Editor
Hi all...I am a recently minted stepdad of a 16 year old girl. We were on the Norwegian Star in december. My wife and I are fairly strict about curfew at home, so my wife thought it needed to be the same on the ship. Once aboard, that changed fairly rapidly...why?? Because we saw the kids she was hanging out with, and we also met their parents. I can safely say that my kid did not come in any night before 0100, and was often later, but, because of the kind of kids she was hanging out with, all was ok. Could she have gotten into trouble??? NO...not my kid...lol. Absolutely, she couuld have, but just like Dan's parents, the penalty would have been to spend EVERY waking hour with us. Hope this helps.
Obviously the parents on this post are responsible or curfews for thier children wouldn't be an issue. Unfortunately for mine, I'm nosy. They never knew when I would wander by the teen activities to see what was going on. When I did run into them, I expected to be introduced to their new-found friends. Having taught high school for a number of years, I've heard all of the horror stories. Cruising is a heady experience and even normally well-behaved kids can get carried away.
I also think it gives them the excuse "my mother would kill me" to be off if things get out of hand
Our family will be on the Serenade to Alaska this July...my girls will be 17 &18 by then...I know they will not be out until 2 or 3am..(and they will not roll their eyes or get PO'd) they know I am (over) protective for their own protection...and (believe it or not) they understand,respect and appreaciate it. (oldest told me 'Im glad you care and set rules, it's not always fun, but , I see people getting in trouble and I'm glad it's not me') I say stick with what works for your kids...they will thank you for it.
My children know I make the rules and they abide by them ...the payoff is I have kids that like to hang out as a family and after all it is a family vacation. I'd be worried sick if my children had the 'run of the ship'...they will have walkie-talkies and time to explore as long as they stay together.
And the 'rules' are in no way out of line...they are common sense...No one in our cabin..and allowed in NO ONE elses cabin..., don't set your drink down...etc..as stated before, children are put with parents so parents can giude them...children (even 'teens') are not equipt to handle every situation that may arise.
JMO: better safe than sorry.
**It's been a lovely cruise**
("Barmaid, play me some BUFFETT)
-Wrinkles only go where the smiles have been-
SERENADE of the SEAS -- 07-23-2006--ALASKA
Donna, My son is 17 and I trust him. When we are at sea the deal is to have breakfast with us and to check in with us at lunch and dinner and to be in the cabin at a reasonable time. And when in port he is not to leave the ship unless he is with one of us. Bill
[quote="CruisinGuy"]So the story begins with 3 of my friends and I planning a highschool graduation trip. My parents brought along me and 3 of my closest friends. Which they now thinking back would never do again.
My mom and dad let us 4 sleep in one room and they took the other. We our 4 very confident guys who like to have fun... to clarify... we are not **jerks** (original word edited). We had so much happen on this cruise its hard to mention all of it. My parents would buy us alcohol on the ship cause u had to be 21 to get it on board. We were all only 18. We rented mo peds and cruised around bermuda, drank hard and danced hard in the disco and on land every night. The 3rd night our friend pat couldent leave the cabin because we had 45 foot waves and he was sea-sick. We called it Extream Dining, and ate and drank all day long, and yea we fell over about every 10 minutes... that day it was a ghost ship. The 4th day was amaizing, we met the rest of the girls on the ship we hadent, and had them in our room the rest of the week, cause we were the only ones sleeping there. We ran the ship, but we werent jerks. we had some confrontation with some kids who tried to throw my friend shaun overboard. No joke. That ended up in a huge fight which we won, but had a security guard posted at our door the remaineder of the week, but he was mad cool, and if u tipped him $30 he would get us 2 beer helmets(thats what they came in) @ 3am.
P.S to our next door neighbors, we know we were loud and if u are soo much of a wuss to send your hott wife over instead of yourself, guy, then expect my naked friend to answer the door, Oh and i hope you liked the brig cause thats where our guard told us you went after you threated to beat us. My parents also couldent care less that we had girls in the room, when you told them, they knew.
i have tons of pics ill put up later, but i gotta run, hope you enjoyed my story...
This was copied from this site's Teen board. Very scary.
April 1, 2006 - Serenade of the Seas - 7 days to the Southern Caribbean
October 8, 1984 - NCL Sunward II - 3 day cruise to the Bahamas
my parents let me do whatever i want. they usually find a nice couple & then i end up hanging out with their kids. if your kids are known to party--watch them, alcohol is at easy access on most of these ships, regardless of what you're told.
On our first cruise we had our kids. My two boys were only 3 and 5 so there was no issue there. My daughter was 12....here was the problem...We got onboard with no clue that the kids activities went so late so the first night we told her to be in by 10:30....well, kids have no track of time so I had to go look for her...she was right where the activitry sheet said they would be....I felt like a fool because there were no other Moms at the dance....ha ha...anyway we became open minded and as long as she checked in whenever she checked herself out of the camp activities and we knew where she was she could stay out late...Midnight.
We are getting ready for another family cruise and she will be 14...a whole new set of rules...I think it will be fine if we keep the same general rule about hanging out in groups and letting us know what she is doing....I think that we will let her stay out till 1am as long as she is in the kids club activities!
Wow, Do all you parents who let your kids have 1 am curfews do that at home? I guess I can see it with a teen over 16, but I think that is very late for the younger teens.
I know it's a vacation, but isn't 10 or 11 late enough for a 12- 15 yr old?
'My son is almost 14and there is no way I'd let him wander the ship till 1 am. What earth would they be doing, plus they would be hanging out with much older kids.
Another important factor is kids sleeping in till noon, when in port, what a WASTE! I guess on sea days it's not such a big factor, then I'd be more lenient, but I still say they can sit in their cabin and watch a movie,after say, 11.
Am I that old fashioned or what??
The thing that scares me is all the stuff on the news about crew members taking these kids and (they are teens ) and doing stuff to them. And all the news about all the people that go overboard and i mean that literally.
I just wanted to post to this from a 19 year olds perspective and maybe it would help out alittle. My first cruise I was 16 and i shared a cabin with my parents. My cousins where there with me also and we all had to be in by 12pm. We would run into them on the ship..try to check in in person whenever we could, but it wasnt nessercary. We also had to attended all the dinners and the shows with our families.
Last year I went on another cruise when I was just turned 18. This time me and my cousin had our own cabin. There were sooo many people we made friends with it was great. We didn't have a cerfew this time. Our parents trust us to not make a rucus (sp?) and cause chaos. We had the late dinner and all of our friends had the early so if we wanted to hang out with them..we needed to be out a little later. Letting your kids roam the ship at night it fine. They are on a ship they can go anywhere..and there really is nothing going on at night. All we did was sit in the deck and talk or go to the discos or something. With the older teens I think you need to give them their freedom or otherwise your going to get that whole "teen attittude this vacation stinks" kinda thing. We once again always ate dinner with out families and left the ship for excusions together, but we were aloud to wander around the islands alone as long as we didn't go anywhere else besides where we said we were going and the ship.
Overall i think 12-15 you need some boundries. After that, set a few key rules, but let them have a vacation too..its a little break from their lives too ya know :-)
I dont think anyone is letting the kids just wander around....the 13-15 yr olds have activities that last until 1or so...but they can check themselves out....causing concern....should you let them do the group actiities or should you make them come in early before they are over. I know last time we cruised they had a midnight pizza party that ended at 1:30...I think I was the only pj wearin' mom that went to get her kid out of the party cuz I was sleepy and could not fall asleep without all my chicks in the nest...I know there is more moms out there like me I just didnt see any then...Is it being a bad parent to let them stay til the activities are over? Am I being an overprotected mom for making her leave the activities before theY are over? ( some of the kids made jokes about her having to leave early)....what to do..
Coming from a teen who has been on 2 cruises (goinf on 3) since becoming a teenager curfews for teens are usually a moot point. My parents trust me and my brother (we are 17 and 15) to not do anything stupid and if we did their would be severe consequences. Most days I would go with my group of friends and my brother with his, we'd all meet up for the activities and when the activities ended we'd stay out walking around, talking and eating the late night cuisine they never failed to have. We never caused massive amounts of trouble, a few times we were asked to lower our voices but nothing major. This would go on til about 2 or 3 and the group would slowly dissipate. Me and my brother still ate dinner with my parents and woke up to go on shore excursions as well as spending other time with them.
So I say give your teens some freedom! This is the time they need to learn to be responsible for themselves and their actions. Plus, it's safer to let them roam on a cruise ship than roam areound with friends at home. If you trust your kids at home, keep your trust for them on vacation, it'll make it a fun time for all of you.
Viking Serenade 4/98
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Ok..after reading a lot of the comments. I felt I should leave something from another point of view of a teen.
I am 18 years old will be traveling on my first cruise and 19. My mom is the MOST overprotective person in the ENTIRE WORLD ! Like..I can't even count the amount of times I wanted to do something and she wouldn't let me. That still happens. But, thats life. Kids are dumb. They want to be "cool". And, on a ship which from what I understand is just a "small city" on the water, I don't know why soo many parents believe their kids would change.
I have seen many parents who think their kids are the best kids on earth. And, that if something happens quickly blame it on the other kids. I personally believe that NO kids should be by themselves or with other "kids" at a late hour.
In small cities bad things happen? Why can't bad things happen on a ship. A walkie-talkie doesn't help if something happens to your kid.
I think freedom should be based upon age. If your kid is 12, I don't think they should be running around the ship with other 12 year olds doing god knows what with god knows who. At the same time, 18 year olds should have freedom but not total freedom. Sometimes on a ship, things go on that can't be controlled.
I personally have gone through the drugs, drinking, and being a complete idiot period. I am now much more mature about many things. So when I see teens on these boards saying "put alcohol in water bottles of the same thing..vodka in water...rum in coke..." I think parents should reconsider the "Freedom". When your kids on the cruise they WANT TO MAKE FRIENDS very badly so they wouldn't be stuck with the adults and family the entire time. Sometimes this leads to them doing bad stuff. I remember I went on a little mini-cruise and a mother was checking on her 24 year old daughter secretly in the clubs to see whats going on.
A concerned parent should stay a conserned parent everywhere. Ok, now im done with my story. sorry, it's long. I just feel that no one can really ask for advice about this subject. Everyone feels differently.
Here is another prospective from an almost 17 year old guy!
A little bit about me!
My parents have always given me trust, which allows me to become more open with people. I always let them know if I am going out, including details where I am going, with who, and when they should expect me back . Let your teen be comfortable, nobody likes stress.
1. A late curfew at least 1:30-2:00 am. (most kids will eventually start to get tired and go to sleep earlier)
2. Make sure to have you teen check in every 3 hours or so.. by seeing you around the ship, leaving notes in room or even calling the room and leaving a message. (Don't make the check less than 3 hours)
3. Be lenient on the rules, nobody likes to be told what to do!
4. Give teens flexibility, let them do their own thing!
5. I do in fact believe that going ashore with family is crutial bonding time! Include your teens in fun activities offshore.
6. Remember, this is their vacation too!
(If you insist on walkie talkies, they should only be for 14 and under.) I believe that if your teen is mature and follows your lenient rules, everyone will enjoy themselves.
I totally agree with Annisherm, a 16 year old girl.
Originally Posted by annisherm
The earliest curfew I'd recommend for a kid over 14 would be 1. 2 or 3 would probably be more realistic. I know this may be hard to accept for parents, but think about it. Your kid will most likely be "hanging out." You may as well earn points with him/her by giving a late curfew because it's not like they are going to get in a car with a drunk driver or something. Trust me, they'll love you for it and you'll llook like Mr. Cool because you let them stay out late, even though they probably aren't even doing anything bad.
BASIC FORMULA- DINNER AND MAYBE BREAKFAST WITH FAMILY+ EXCURSIONS WITH FAMILY+ CHECK-INS A FEW TIMES A DAY+ A 1-3 AM CURFEW= HAPPY TEEN=HAPPY PARENTS.
I've already posted here but since I have now done my first cruise on one of the new megaships (Mariner) I thought I'd weigh in my opinion again.
As stated before my parents are pretty flexible and they trust my brother and I. Most nights I was in the cabin by 2-3am and woke up anywhere from 7-10 (Im not one for sleeping late.) I would eat breakfast with my family (except the last day), go on shore and eat dinner with them. Other than that me and my brother were free to do whatever.
With that said....The teen disco for 15-17 did not start until 11pm and we would sometimes be there dancing until 2am. It is TOTALLY unrealisitic to want your teen to come in at 11 because that is right in the middle of all of the fun. The teens are supervised while in the activities and there is nothing to worry about.
My group of friends would leave the disco when it started to die down and go to the champagne lounge to hang out and talk. We were just sitting around getting to know each other and having a good time, werent disturbing anyone. One night we even went out on deck and stayed out there all night. It was nice to be out under the stars on the Caribbean with friends, such a relaxing atmosphere. All of the ones who stayed have parents who trust them not to do anything stupid.
With all this being said, you have to know your teen. If they are prone to getting in trouble you may want to keep a closer eye on them but if they are a good kid at home let them have their freedom.
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As a single Dad traveling with my daughters (11 and 13) on the Crown Princess over Spring Break (April 7), I'm not sure what to expect. This will be their forst cruise. I assume there will be lots of kids on board and that will be great for my daughters. I'm not worried about them finding something to do. Actually, I am more concerned that they will have too much to do and I'll be a one-some everywhere I go.
Breakfasts, dinners, excursions and two-way radios. Got it. And thanks. That makes lots of sense.
Does anybody have an idea as to how late the kids programs go on the Princess cruises?
I'll ask Princess and respond to you in a few days. The 11 year old will be in the youth program which ends at 10 p.m. --- after that, you have to pay an hourly fee. The teen program will go later -- that's what I'll find out for you.
Luisa Frey Gaynor
Family Cruise Editor
Hello. I've cruised with children of all ages on various cruise lines and feel they have been pretty safe. We cruised with a group of about 30 teens last year, and a few of them learned the hard way that their bags (purses, backpacks) are searched by the staff when going into the teen clubs. Also, they can buy alcohol in many ports, but they won't get it back on to the ship because of the searches when coming on board. As I said, a few of the kids learned this the hard way when they and their families were almost sent home for violating the rules. Also, in some areas, teens are allowed to buy alcohol on ship at age 18, not 21, and I saw several teens getting their older friends to buy them drinks. But, this was only the kids looking for trouble. It really depends on the teen, but sometimes they are more apt to break the rules because they are on vacation, etc. For that reason, I'd let them have freedom, but with strict check-in times.