ladies beware of the love starved crew guys. U can't trust them. They may want to romance u and trick u into thinking hhe loves uand can't live w/o u. Every cruise I had one to attach themselves to me. Yead I know I am sexy and have a fun contagious personality. But I have to be wise and so should u. A cruise vacation should be fantasy filled but be smart . Have a good time but be smart. I dont know if u know th movie "How Stella got her groove back". Well years later after the famous author Terry M. the book/movie is the true story about her meeting this gorgeous young man in Jamaica. This man romanced her and she fell in love. Years later and right now they are going thru a divorce. Of course, he wants half of heer fortune. But her argument is that he lied and tricked her. And worse of all he is GAY. He pretented to love her just to get citizenship, plus a good life she provided for him. You see how cruel this is.SoI say Ladies be careful of the natives when u visit these islands.
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sorry to sound denigrating san007, but did you just figure this one out????
No one can charm you or get to you unless you let them.
Did you just have a bad experience?
Try reversing the situation, act real romantic and at some point suggest that you have applied for citizenship in Jamaica (or whatever country they are from) but are having trouble getting it. And suggest that if you get married maybe you can live with him in whatever country he's from. See how genuine his affections are!!
Yep - especially you ladies with "stupid" stamped on your forehead. Like anyone would actually fall for that crap. What, exactly - does this crew member have to offer in the way of a long term relationship - a shared bunk lol. I prefer to think we of the fairer sex - are a little brighter than that - right ladies? TTFN Jennifer
The message is true, though. And I am sure the situation she decribes has happened. When I worked on ships I talked to crew members (usually the lowest level positions with people who barely speak English) who were thinking this job was just a step to meeting someone who would help them get US citizenship.
I am sorry this woman fell for it though,usually you can see it within 5 minutes of talking to them with that puppy-dog look.
Don't get me wrong, this is not a common thing. I can think of 2 incidents in 2 years of being on ships, but it does happen.
I am the editor, but I also speculate, ask questions and play devil's advocate. I reserve the right to change my mind.
Then there are the crew members who have to look out for love starved passengers. This may sound like a tongue in cheek response but it isn't. I have known passengers who have gone onboard with the dream of having a romantic fling with an officer or a crew member. Most of the time their dreams are dashed because a crew member will lose their job for fulfilling them but it does happen and I can attest to it.
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Who are you trying to make aware? People who are desperate and may have put themselves on a plate to new MEN in their lives and go for a quick "wam bam,,thank you mam" and then feel they have recourse, because the engagement ring did not follow them off the ship,,,,,eh.
Will all single women cruising with us trying to find Mr Right, please take a reality check at our next port of call,,,,,or just have fun.
hey I was never foolish to,fall for it. I was just making the point that it happens. I've been "tried" on all of my cruises and travels to the islands. I mean who wouldn't like all of that attention. One of the examples was the fact of Terry Mcmillan, author and movie maker "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" was a victim ofthis very thing. She herself is very sucesssful and wise. That goes to show you everyone can be a little vunerable. So the clear the confusion, I didn't have a bad experience.
my daughter who was recently divorced went on a cruise with a bunch of our family. there were like 10 of us. Well the head waiter who was French....... Was quite the charmer. he treated My daughter like she was the princess. It was good for her ego at the time it came about. Nothing really happened except he took her for some drinks and his parents were on the cruise and she was introduced to them. It was a great memory for her. We have many pictures of the two of them for her scrap book. She will never forget Pierre........ She claims it was her best and favorite cruise she ever took.
Ok, now I am bummed, not a single person tried to hit on me on our cruise lol, but I would never take for granted that my adorable daughter would be left alone. I know that there is a lot of harmless flirting on vacation, but remember, the guy that looks so good to you on the ship may not look all that good lounging on your couch, jobless.
I know, I know. This happens to me all the time. Every cruise I go on the love starved crew members want to see me after they get off work. I try to avoid them but they always find my room number and come knocking late at night. My DW hates it too but then she knew what she was getting when she said "I do."
I can see right through them though. They only want citizenship and not me. I wasn't born yesterday!!! <wink>
Whay have I never been so lucky? I have seen plenty of hot chics working on ships and none of them has ever tried to seduce me. I would gladly oblige them but then would have to break their hearts when I went on home.
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I disagree with that Just4Kian, I think the "fantasy" part is largely there because of the fact that they are away from home, no one knows them, perhaps can get away with being a little naughty. Perhaps they let their guard down a little. It's the same feeling we get when we go on a cruise, the relaxation, away from work, away from home, the stress ooozing out of you as you are on deck and the ship leaves port. For them, the "normal" restraints around courtship oooze out too!
Banker, I know women. Not all women, but lots of women. Any woman who falls in love with/ believes what the cabin guy/ cabana boy says in the throes of passion really was looking for something to beleive in along those lines.. and would probably do that at home as well. Maybe not at the local tavern, but at the one just up the road in the next town over! Many women still buy into the Hollywood idea that one night of passion might turn around Mr. Right. And I guess for some guys it will... but....
I find it very odd that many men go on vacations, conventions, business trips, etc. and engage in the same hanky panky but don't seem to come home in love with the person who provided the mischief. What's that about?
that's a good question. I don't know why men don't get caught up in the romance of an away from home fling. Maybe because it's not about romance at all, it's just the physical part and possibly the "knowing you still can" part. A lot of times your spouse (this goes for both) is usually nagging and criticizing etc and it's a powertrip to know that you can still go out and score a hot babe? Maybe it's a midlife thing for men to feel rejeuvenated with a 24 year old hottie.
Maybe it's the opposit for women but they need to feel romanticized and given attention in a "shirley valentine" sort of way - hell I don't know......
just an afterthought, my wife tells me I don't have the "sh..it" anymore. I disagree. I think I am just as fit, have a lot more money, and am more sophisticated (in a "planet of the apes") sort of way. In another life I would love to prove her wrong. Maybe if our marriage was on the rocks or something I would be temped to. I don"t know.
she says filthy paws, "get your filthy paws off me you da**mn dirty banker" and THAT'S during..........
anyways, she shows the same shock and surprise as the apes do in the movie when I actually speak and say something intelligent.....or around a group of her friends, they all gasp and take a step backwards!
ladies beware of the love starved crew guys. U can't trust them. They may want to romance u and trick u into thinking hhe loves uand can't live w/o u. Every cruise I had one to attach themselves to me. . .
You know there are women who go on cruises just to look for employees of the ship to be seduced.
Holy crap! All this discussion and I just read other posts of San's and see that she's 15 years old and trying to find guys to pick up even before she gets on the ship. Note to God: Please watch over San's mother. She needs you.